Welcome to Gaia! :: View User's Journal | Gaia Journals

Is it weird how one minute your life can be completely falling apart and the next you find yourself trying to pretend all is perfectly well and having a conversation with a complete stranger from New Orleans about wines? I thought so too...

Went into the fest briefly, was almost too afraid that Andreas would be there, but he wasn't. Instead of doing what I had come there to do, which was to tell Mist about Andreas and, pitifully, ask if he dare keep an eye out for him on my behalf, I ended up getting into a deep talk with a man named Mercer... charming, vaguely French, and very.... very strange. At first I wasn't sure if he was just being friendly or actually trying to hit on me, but I've made my decision it was the latter, after I mentioned Rupert very curteously. Apparently he has a thing for grapes... and good wine. Which is surprising we held the conversation so long as my alcoholic history consists of a few girly drinks, most likely what was cheap wine, and that one time Souji and I downed the vodka. Though I did try his apparent favourite of Dirty Bastards. He mentioned Rupert would like dark wines based on his German talents in choice of beer, and that he'd be more than willing to show me his knowledge of wine, especially for special occassions with Rupert. He offered to bring some to the fest if I was unsure about going to a stranger's home... sometimes it's nice to remember that there is random kindness in this world.

The rehersals for the play go well. Oscar Wilde is all about timing, because the lines are so witty, but they have to be careless, nonchalant, as if they, despite their brilliancey and absurdness, are being said off the top of the head in everyday life. The prof is impressed with my progress, it seems, and has been shelling out a lot of praise. This might be a good turning point for me, I could get into a really tough, good class next year if I keep it up. I wonder if Rupert will come see the show?

....just....don't ask about what happened last night after Andreas. Please. I'm still in denial trying to pretend everything's still ok, because aside from Hasami, nobody really knows what's going on. That's both a relief and almost hurts more, I think, because it gives me the chance, in the fest, for example, to just smile and nod like everything's nomal. And it's so far from good... Sometimes I wonder if this is all really a bad dream and if I close my eyes long enough, I'll wake up and it will have never happened...