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Maybe I just need to start accepting that fact that I am an evil, chaotic, b***h. So I dumped Jeremy on his birthday. I didnt' do that on purpose. The reason I burnt the bridge the way I did was because I didn't want him coming back, and I am still trying to fight him off. I keep having nightmares. Just when I think everything is ok, I sense this eerie cataclysmic feeling and then it all leads to me dreaming about the ******** doing some really bad thing. Even mario senses it, and so dose Yolie. I would put down Jesse, but I don't know if I believe her anymore.
And I don't stop being peoples freinds unless they quite being mine or if they give me good reason. So I am bit immature and I take jokes too far. But dose that really make me a bad person? I bet you anything Both Cherish and Persona think it was just bad of me to dump Jeremy altogether. And that's why this whole thing ******** haunts me. Because I am being condemned by other people such as Persona and Cherish, all over teh fact that I dumped him on his birthday. Oh boo hoo. They get all sentimental over a day. Who cares. The only special days I even care about anymore are Christmas and Holloween. I am also a bad person because I like attention and I do crazy s**t in public. It's just how I am. Why am i expected to be this perfect little girl who sits still and just lets people walk all over her. And as for the jokes....who cares if I carry them on. Why am I a bad person over something like that. Is the Ms. Lavender jokes? Oh my God, but it was perfectly ok for Cherish to tease me about Jeremy. I hate people. You know what. Maybe I'll just go ahead a burn another bridge. I may be this totally evil chaotic person, but unlike Jeremy and his darkness, I don't hide it behind this glorified picture of myself as a balanced person who is so rightious with no sexual desire or animal instincts. at least i don't lie about being chaos. AT LEAST I DON'T DENY BEING CHAOS!!!!!