I close my eyes and breath. I practiced over and over again this breathing to relax myself. I feel each inch of me slowly unwind from the stress of the day and I find myself in a state that I could only achieve... That I can finally achieve now.
I find that perfect balance and begin to mentally chant something I haven't in months... I chant the memories of us. Each chant brings a perfect detailed vision of you and I. Everything comes rushing to me again as I feel the bridge of emotions reattach, even for a brief while, and our heart beats align once more.
A smile grows on my face, one so long forgotten ever since your departure in my life. Memories begin to take over as I watch in appreciate, not sadness that it's over, the moments we spent together.
It begins with the first time we met. You remember rushing to me because you were running late? How you arrived on that bus after paying the ticket? How you made friends with the bus driver and he was so happy to see you found me?
Did I ever tell you how nervous I was? How the entire flight, despite it being my very first time ever flying, I was super nervous about seeing you. Would you like my hair? Would I be your type in person? Was I going to mess up and you wouldn't like me? Did I smell good enough?
I remember how my heart sank into my stomach with anticipation when the plane finally landed and I was in the terminal. I took myself out of my body as I was walking, thinking; Here I am... Going to see the woman I've only dreamed of seeing... Oh God I'm so nervous!
Never in my life would I have ever done something like that for ANYONE else. Not then, not now, and not ever. As I finally made my way to where the people usually see one another, I was so afraid when I didn't see you. I know I texted you and you told me you were running late... But I was so scared. I didn't know if you'd come up, I didn't know if you were going to be everything my mom told me about (You know, an online predator looking to harvest my organs and stuff).
But all that melted away when you told me you were there... And my heart sank once more in nervous fear. I must have rushed out those doors and quickly recovered myself because I flew out that airport when you told me you were there. Every step and second looking for you felt like a moment in eternity and I couldn't stand it... I wanted you right now.
Then, the most magical thing in my entire life happened: I saw you
You weren't wearing anything fancy. You weren't sporting anything amazing; just a regular shirt that you like a lot, some jeans obviously worn from over-usage, and a casual pair of sneakers. No one would have ever thought that you were the one who has my heart so tightly in her grasp. But let me tell you... That day was when I knew no other women would ever matter to me and no one else would ever have my love, for I that day... I fell in instant love with a Goddess.
You weren't what I dreamed of; You were so much more. So much more that I had to rush into you as I saw you laughing and trying to hide your blush from. So much that I had to take you in my arms and hold you tight before I cried. So much that no one has ever felt right in my arms ever since and never will. So much that... I can't be anything else other than yours from that very moment you held me tight.
I slowly exhale all the negativity of what I did wrong to you and inhale again the magic between us and all the amazing things we still can do with one another. I build that bridge one more time to feel our hear beats lapse once more before finally letting every emotion flutter against my skin and disperse across the winds.
I don't think we're done and I don't ever want to give up on us... I can't help it and you'll hate me for it (you always do)... But I just can't.
Right from the start
You were a thief
You stole my heart
And I your willing victim
I let you see the parts of me
That weren't all that pretty
And with every touch you fixed them
I love you. I miss you. Please come back.
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Always thinking of the possibility of you and me...
Always thinking of the possibility of you and me...