....as i walked up the stairs to continue my tutoring...i came across a feeling of doubt...a feeling of complete death, i seriously thought that if i went another 4 hours with tutoring...I'd die....I had no motivation, no reason to life that day, i shoulda just stayed in the bed that morning but i felt a need of duty as i gave my word to the "dean of boys". Wishing that i'd see this girl, knowing that it was only a 9% chance that i would see her there...I didn't want to talk to her nor be near her, just seeing her was enough to satisfy me....enough to cure the urge of lust for her...as i went down the stairs to get the books for the students...something told me to stop looking down at the ground and look up, i looked up as i walked down the stairs...there she was....the second i seen her my day shined brighter than the sun thyself....the radiance that brimmed from her body clear the path in the shadowy world i entered that morning...feeling completed that moment, i spoke in my usual manner "hola my love" she smiled and said hola back. that was enough to last me an eternity of hell on this planet. about an hour later the tutors got a break and got to walk the halls in rest and ya know, refreshmentation( i made that up lol) after i went to the restroom, i looked up and seen her walking my way, i thought she was gonna talk to someone else...but no, she talked to me from out of no where, she ignored everything and everyone talking to her just to talk to me, like an idiot i got nervous...and i tried my best to stay calm while i talked to her. the conversation was pretty boring cause i was caught off guard by her sudden conversation, i didn't know what to say to anything so iwent with the flow and acted somewhat normal but not the normal me. i almost farted super loud...that's how nervous i was, the gutts in me was stirring up and kicking my kidney, i felt horrible on the inside but i still talked to her until igot to the point of where i thought i was gonna die so i dumbly stopped talking to her in the middle of her sentence and talk to someone else to ease it abit....surprisingly she was still there...waiting for me...i felt so wrong for doing that but i had no other choice...so we continued and then we said our farewells with a smile i'm surprised she talked to me like that...i felt so happy but dumb...a good dumbly happy smile so refreshing that day was!
many people may not know the reason one may love...or if love truly exist...but if it does...it lies within the light of tomorrow that taunts us on our inability to see the next...yesterday ( 9, 27, 0 cool was truly a wonderful day after i seen her, i haven't had such a day since...i can't remember when...
 Deaths Comotose · Sun Sep 28, 2008 @ 11:17pm · 1 Comments |
