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Here's a story I heard in the third grade:
A girl was babysitting her younger sister with her boyfriend in their shared room. The couple wanted to have sex on the top bunk-bed, and tried to convince the younger sister to leave. The younger sister refused to leave the bedroom, bawling out in a vicious temper tantrum. "Fine," they said, "but you have to face the wall and not bother us." The little girl agreed to do so.
Hoping not to alert the sister to the true nature of their 'bed games,' the older sister told her boyfriend, "When I say 'lettuce,' go faster. When I say 'tomato,' go slower." As they went at it, the older sister could be heard yelling "Lettuce!" and "Tomato!" when all of a sudden, the little sister cried out: "Hey you two! Make your sandwiches in the kitchen! Your getting mayo all over me!"