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My life I plan to write about what has been happening so far in the last 3 months. Fights, love and a knife.


mara20
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Okay, now you know a bit of background info. I will start in the other beginning.
One day, Edward and I were at the school park. We were alone, and since I liked him, I felt all "fluttery" inside. We were just sitting when he said, "Samara?" and I was like, "Yeah?" Then what he said rocked my world, backward. "I think I like Bella," he admitted. I froze and turned around to face him. "Really? Your not just pulling my leg?" There goes every chance I had, I thought. We talked about it for a bit then I headed home.
That night, I called Lydia to ask her if she liked Edward. After some probing, she admitted that she did. I called Edward and told her. I know, I'm evil. Anyway, the next day, I came home from church. And I found Edward and Bella at the park. Bella was wearing Edward's sweatshirt. I realized what had happened. Sighing, I joined them.
Things happened and one day, on the bus home, I said. "Why are you throwing your life away?!" she got all offended. Bella asked how she was. "Well," I said, "For one, look at all the guys that like you! You know what I would give for that? And you just ignore them for some guy who HAS A GIRLFRIEND, WHO IS 3 YEARS OLDER THEN YOU!" I shouted. That did it. It sparked an ever-lasting argument. One time, I wanted to stop hanging out with Edward. Bella was all like, "No! No, it's not the same! Blah, blah, blah, he needs you!" I finally gave in and agreed to keep on hanging out. More bad things happened and I went suicidal. Of course Bella called, sobbing and said how everone will miss me and stuff. So I gave in once more, thinking it will be better. A couple of day passed. One thing I should mention, Edward and his girlfriend had been together for 8 months. And she was dangerous, she put a girl into a coma for filrting with Edward. That's pretty much the only reason Bella and edward held back. Blech. Then, that very week, this happened:
We went over to Edward's house, cause Bella wanted to chill with him. we went there and it was COLD. First, I was sitting with Bella on Edward's mini-bench. Then she got off and sat on the floor. Edward stood up and told me to get off, which I did, then he invited Bella up. Then they played footsies, held hands and shared hoodies, right IN FRONT of me. I was so mad. I mad eup an excuse and left.
Yeah, that pretty much did. After arguing over e-mail/text with my friend Denise, I concluded that the only person on my side were my best friend Dani and myself. Great. And Denise agrees that I should not be Lydia's friend anymore. Great. At least some of the pain will stop with her dismissal.





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Names may have been changed for security, including my own)

Hey! Welcome to my first blog! I'm Samara--for those of you who don't know me. I decided to make a blog because, well, my life is a living hell right now. A hand-written or personal typed diary isn't very trustworthy, so I will let my entries get lost in the 'net.
Well, I just got this idea yesterday--but this event has been going on for sometime. So, please bear with me as I try to cram. Okay, well I think I should start with an intro-thingy. Again, I'm Samara. I live in Illinois and I am 13 years-old. There's a few people I should tell you about. First, there's Bella, Bella Swan(Sorry, name was on a whim). I have known Bella for a good chunk of time, but we've only been really good friends for a few mouths. Then, there's Edward. Good old Edward Cullen. And yes, I'm going somewhere with these names. I--meaning Bella and I--met Edward in the summer. He's 16 and Bella and me are 13, just for reference.
Hmm...I'll start at the beginning:
It was sometime around August--maybe July. We were at the park--Bella, me and a few other people. We saw this guy at the baseball field, wearing black. We didn't know his name, so we called him "Emo Dude". Over the next few days, we toyed with him--as teenagers do. Until Bella and this other girl--Nikki--found out his name, saying it was Edward. Being the little girls we were, we were ecstatic.
One day, we found him at the park. He was in some trouble with his stalker, so it was fun. Anyway, Bella aquired his number and it all went uphill for her. And me...for a while, then it plummeted into "darkness deep as hell." ~Phantom of the Opera(It's a quote, people)




mara20
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