Welcome to Gaia! :: View User's Journal | Gaia Journals

Your browser has JavaScript disabled. Enable JavaScript on your browser for most GaiaOnline features to work correctly.

View User's Journal

Report This Entry Subscribe to this Journal

	Ninja-ing my way through Life
	Ninja-ing my way through Life

	Sex
	Sex


Yeah, I just watched a CBC program on sex with teenagers. It was called secrets, threy talkied to two chicks and then these two couples. They went on for awhile about basic things, and how little sex ed kids actually get these days and stuff like that. The two girls were 13 and 14, the couples were older. One couple was 15/17 and the other was 17/18. It was pretty intersting overall, good to know what the rest of the world thinks and does about sex, because I know for a fact that in that general region of being a teenager I am most definitely more sheltered. My parents are classic christians, I was told what sex was when I was like 12, since then my parents and I haven't discussed it at all. My parents are in general skirmish around sex, they are sooo tolerant of violence and stuff in movies, but they can't take anything sexual at all, not ewven like a make-out scene, it's wierd. This documentary was really intersting and kind of shocking, like they intywerviwed a bunch of freaking 8th graders and stuff, a lot of them have had sex, even more of them have had/given blowjobs and the like. Dating isn';t the norm, friends with privaleges is. I semi knew about all of that stuff already, so it wasn't a huge shock. The shock was the parents of the kids they used in the film. They were so open, and they talked so freely about it with their parents, like it was nothing. When the two girls went out to a party, the farewell wasn't like 'don't drink, be safe' it was 'make sure you bring a condom with you'. I'm very supportive of safe sex, it sure as hell beats getting pregnant or a STD or some st like that, but my parents really aren't like that. Maybe a lot of parents are and mine are just freaks who avoiud sex as much as possible, to avoid the subject, pretend it's not there. That's probably notr the safest thing to do, I know the basics sure, talk about it when it comes up, it wasn't really anything i've thought mahjorly abvout. It wasn't a huge part of my life, I'm a bit of a square, i'm in band for crissakes. I've been thinking about it more, which I guess is normal, apparently. But I see the parents in these movies, and they have these opinions and it's not the abstinance stuff that i know my parents would shovel at me if they were asked. It's stuff like 'i trust my kids, i hope they're careful' ' I make sure they've got a condom with them when they go out.' I don't carry condoms, I don't have casual sex either. I also don't plan on having casual sex, but i also see myself a bit more likely to randomly get drunk then say, Kim, so you really never know what's gonnna happen when you're drunk, as miuch as i hope i'll never get drunk to the point that i'll become that unaware of my surroundings. But it'lll probably happen and hoperfully i'll get lucky, the point it. I think sex is special, something that happens between two people who care about each other, but it's not as sacred as having to hang on to your virginity till your married, because in todays society its just plain old unreasonable to think that it's going to happen. As teens, we aren't rebellious really, society has changed alltogether and parents may or may not have trouble accepting it. I'll probvably have sex before I'm married, yeah I can see it hapenning. But the risks are huge, bigger for me then a guy. Because I can get pregnant and I'm against abortion. Unless you've gotten raped or something. But if you chose to have sex and you got pregnant, well then you're screwed and you get to keep the baby, wehter you put it up for adoption is your chocie, hopefully you'd make the right one based on whatever your living style is. However, right now I'm still a virgin, and it really is a bit of a surprise to watch this video and see that alot of kids that i have like 2-3 years on aren't anymore. Is casual sex really the way of the future? And how would you go about that with parents? I mean, what if you wanna be extra safe and go on the Pill or something? If you're doing this and you wanna keep it from your parents how would you pull that? Ypu live with your parents, they would find out at sojme point that you're taking the pill and not telling them, for that reason that woulsd assume and then you'd be in st, there'd be nothing you could do about it. Condoms don't ahve the best success rate, and you can never have too much apparently. I don't really know where I was going with this, I just watched this video and it really got me thinnking about how sheltered my world is, because what they showed on that video isn't my world. Everywhere I go I see people depict the world as teens see it, and it doesn't seem to be what I see. Kids who;'re like 12, getting drunk at parties and girls giving guys head so that they won't get dumnped. Friends with privilages, something we've always joked about but i've never seen it happen. I've glimpsed the world they've shown, Dot seems to be a part of it in some way, because she goes to her drinking parties and makes out with random girls so it seems. So this world obviously does exist, my cousin Marie lives there too. She's been drinking and that kind of stuff since she was 1,, but she lives in Canso where you can get beer off your neighbor since the store can't sell it to you, that dpe4sn't exempt her, but it's my excuse for the way she is. And the way that I'm not. I've been drunk, with marie actually, and her dad and mom. It wasn't that awesome, it didn't suck. I get giddy when I'm drunk so there ya go, not a big change from what i am usually. But sex for 13 yr olds? I just can't faothom it, I dunno what this world has come to really anymore. Who knows, i mean, how many people do i know that aren't virgins anymore? I only know one guy who's for sure had sex and that Erik and that's because erik hung out with 20yr olds because erik can pass for being at least 19 even though i'm a good 8 months oler then he is. In short, I've realized that I don't know jack st about this kind of thing and that I live in a sheltered little box. I always knew I was in this box, and I've got some good people here with me. However, it's the people I don't know, the ones who're 3years youner then I am that've got me worried. Please ignore horrible spelling, I'm tpying this really fast and was kind of rambling a lot. Thoughts on this? [Tetris.Ninja]** · Tue Mar 22, 2005 @ 03:18am · 16 Comments


[Tetris.Ninja] Community Member «Prev \| Next» Archive \| Home [10/18/07 04:49am] [08/31/07 07:08pm] [08/30/07 03:01am] [09/26/06 02:22am] [06/18/06 11:37pm] [06/17/06 04:15pm] [05/24/06 12:45am] [05/14/06 04:51am] [03/27/06 03:32pm] [03/20/06 12:24am]

	User Comments: [16]
	User Comments: [16]


	Its surprisingly more common than it seems. But commonness doesn't denote smartness. Maybe we're more mature? I dunno. It is a common topic to think about, however. Its kind of scary... 13 year olds? I mean... youngness! Ack. I can't think of anything more interesting to say. >P Offline strawberry jelly · Community Member · Tue Mar 22, 2005 @ 11:47pm


	I am really tired right now. So writing, in general, won;t be good for me. Yet here I stand, commmenting, on something that doesn't mean much to me. I think everything has changed since parents were younger, but they still went through everything we are going through; this just happened later on for them. Mine aren't the kind of parents who like to keep me in a box. They let me have my freedom and learn, but they don't really trust me. I think most parents shouldn't trust their kids. I look at what I act like around them, so maybe its good that they have a tight leash on me. Don't lead into my last sentence. Heh. I am in no hurry to lose my virginity. I can't really see this opportunity ariding anytime soon and I am not going to go looking for it. Since I don't want to have casual sex, I don't need protection of any kind. If I did want to run around having casual sex, then maybe it would be a good thing I mention it to my parents. Just jumping out into oblivion with some pills and condoms isn't a good idea. Or at least that is my opinion. It's really hard to excpress this without dragging some other form of stuff into this topic. You shouldn't drink when underage because things like that can happen. If you feel thus compelled to rick being the 16 yr old chick with the baby, then drink or whatnot. Really, laws and rules are esteablished to allow for things like values to be decided. If you feel that having fun being drunk is more important that your safety, by all means go for it. Hearing about you drunk does nothing for me. In fact, I think it is stupid. Since I feel so strongly against it, naturally, I will be drawn to it at some point. Keep me away from alcohol. Parents who show as little regard as the ones on the film probably shouldn't be parents. How would you feel if your dad just handed you a condom everytime you left the house "just in case" you ran into somebody? It's not a very comforting thought, in my opinion. Maybe it might come in handy, but really, who are you willing to screw now? I won't play dumb and say that you have to stay away from the opposite sex and never have sex until you are married, but maybe trying to avoid having sex a lot before marriage is a good thing. Just think of it like this: everybody your partner has had sex with, you will have sex with, once you have sex with your partner. Makes it sound gross, but it is true. Really, your questions seem kind of shifty to me. But if you ever need somebody to talk to about this, I am willing to open my ears. I don't have much to say but meh. Offline Mini Effi · Community Member · Wed Mar 23, 2005 @ 03:00am


	ok, different topic than usual. So a comment, I don't really know how I feel about this particualr issue, I know that I've been told not to get anyone pregnant...no church like reasons there. Basically, I think casual sex is really stupid. people these days seem to treat sex more like a source of pleasure rather than a special thing between 2 people that love each other. Sex is supposed to be a special, sacred thing...not something that you have with a stranger on the street..in my opinion. And I think its kinda old fashion to 'save sex for marriage'. I know alot of people don't anymore and I can see myself getting married as a non-virgin. That's pretty much my take. But if you're gonna have sex, do it with protection. There's no sense in bringing a baby into this world if it doesn't have a family, which no one can provide at our age. If you want to go on the pill for whatever reason...do it with you parents knowledge and hopefully support...no sense hiding it it will just be worse in the long run. As for underaged sex, I think the age of consent should be 15 or 16...cause a 13 year old doing that is just stupid. They're wasting their childhood. I don't think you should be dealing with this kinda stuff before you've made it half way through puberty. Most 13 year olds voices still haven't changed, so they don't need to be concerning themselves with sex. Its kinda a contraversial topic...and its mostly personal values. But sex will always be a special thing between a man and a woman who love each other for me, I refuse to involve myself in anything like casual sex...but I'm still a virgin. I'm not going to go looking for sex....but if it comes my way and I feel the time is right than ya. Follow your heart. Offline DaSpin · Community Member · Wed Mar 23, 2005 @ 10:26pm


	yes ma'am. Actual semi-thought out things. ^_^ Offline [Tetris.Ninja] · Community Member · Thu Mar 24, 2005 @ 12:50am


	I know this is kinda off topic, but Bex, geez, you gotta stop naming names! This is the second time you have come hazardously close to saying something about someone that they might not like out in the open. I don't know your cousin or Dot or Erik very well, but please, if you're gonna say something about them, don't let it be personal stuff like this. sigh Now that I've got that off my chest, on to the whole sex thing. Sheltered is not necessarily bad. We get to focus on important things like friendship and family, because we aren't off having wild sex somewhere. Second of all, tv lies. They want you to believe in their argument, and they will bias their facts. So some teeny-boppers like to get drunk and experiment with the Kama Sutra instead of baking soda and vinegar. That doesn't mean that half the population of american girls is going to be pregnant by the time they reach age 17. What you didn't see on that show is the other half of the teenagers they interviewed, who, like us, believe that sex is important and should not be thrown around for fun. You also didn't see the parents who would forbid their kids from going to drinking parties, and respect them enough to let them out on the street without an emergency condom. Don't let this one show be your only source. It does not contain all the info you need to know. Offline Teh Muffin · Community Member · Thu Mar 24, 2005 @ 01:57am


	You know, if you really want to be on the pill, you could use the premise that it regulates your, uhm, feminine cycles. It also keeps them reasonably small, and provides other benefits which don't come to mind at the moment. Offline bentbacktulips · Community Member · Thu Mar 24, 2005 @ 02:08am


	Y'know, Marc, I don't that she specifically wants to get on the pill. I think it was more for thought. Or more I hope it was more for thought. I, knowing very little about everything, don't see any logic reason to take the pill now. It's not like Beccy runs around trying not to get pregnant while having sex. Nor does she really seem to have fits of death over her "feminin cycle", to use Marc's words. Maybe I am just missing something, but it seems to pointless to want to get on the pill, especially behind the backs of your parents. This kind of occured to me earlier this afternoon. Most people I know seem to talk a lot about sex/sexual acts, but really they don't seem to know anything about it. Just knowing its name doesn't allow for one to be considered knowlegable enough in sex. Don't mind me. It was just something I noticed while being bored. Offline Mini Effi · Community Member · Thu Mar 24, 2005 @ 02:18am


	Of course TV lies, it's always an exaggerration, they'd never get ratings if they didn't exaggerate some. I was just making a comparison and then rambling pointlessly afterwards. My general opinion is true and such. If you don't like the way I write my journal, don't read it. Marc, I don't want to go on the pill, I'm sure if I wanted to I could come up with a good excuse to. Offline [Tetris.Ninja] · Community Member · Thu Mar 24, 2005 @ 02:21am


	1.) The pill also cures acne, I believe. 2.) If you feel thus compelled to risk being the 16 yr old chick with the baby, then drink or whatnot. - Effi Thats a bit exxagerated. How is drinking a risk for becoming pregnant? Even though while drinking you tend to lose most judgement, basic morals do usually stick with you. Hence why people, when drunk, remember not to drink or drive. Unless you're a horny person or something on the inside, because what alcohol does is it inhibits your ability to hide you're actual feelings. So yeah. Example: Say you are a person with violent tendencies. Usually in public you would hide the violence, but if you're drunk it would be harder to hide the violence, thus why some people get violent when theur drunk. The same goes for giddy-drunks, depressed-drunks, and silly-drunks. Thus, drinking a bit (Which is actually pretty normal for teenagers) won't automatically make you some teenaged mother. Nor would it increase the risk by a whole lot. The end. n.n Offline strawberry jelly · Community Member · Thu Mar 24, 2005 @ 10:27pm


	Thank you for correctly my already accurate and set ideas, Kim. <i>Even though while drinking you tend to lose most judgement, basic morals do usually stick with you. Hence why people, when drunk, remember not to drink or drive.</i> Hmmm. I don't believe so. I have seen people actually try to drive right after drinking. My mom stopped them. The whole issue is that after drinking your judgement is impared. This means you can not make decisions with good judgement but rather going on impulse and what "feels" right. <i>Thus, drinking a bit (Which is actually pretty normal for teenagers) won't automatically make you some teenaged mother. Nor would it increase the risk by a whole lot. The end. n.n </i> Think what you want. Your thoughts here just make you look very stupid, in my opinion. The reason laws and rules are put in place is to keep people safe. You, of all people, should recognize that. If you seem to think that underaged drinking will do nothing to you except make you giddy, you suck. The end. stare Offline Mini Effi · Community Member · Fri Mar 25, 2005 @ 07:27pm


	Effi : Please explain to me exactly what magical thing happens when you turn 19, 18, 21, or 16, to make you suddenly responsible, and why it's different depending on where you are in the world. Offline bentbacktulips · Community Member · Sat Mar 26, 2005 @ 01:46pm


	<i>Please explain to me exactly what magical thing happens when you turn 19, 18, 21, or 16, to make you suddenly responsible, and why it's different depending on where you are in the world.</i> Nothing happens, this is true and I never claimed that anything would happen. That doesn't mean that <b>laws or reules</b> aren't put into place to allow for some sort of safety. Assuming that people are responsible 16, 18, 19 or 21 is stupid. However, this doesn't mean that taking precautions and setting up guidelines with regards to a proper drinking age isn't necessary. Allow people to drink when they feel they are responsible enough is equally as, if not more, stupid. I don't expect any of you to agree with me, but suggesting that people should be running around drunk because nothing will happen, as Kim stated, is stupid. This is why they have an age where the government decides it is acceptable. Doesn't mean the age is right but it allows for a little bit more safety than allowing people to decide for themselves. Marc: Tell me why people should be deciding their own age to start drinking. Tell me why teens our age should be drinking, even if it impairs judgement. Offline Mini Effi · Community Member · Sat Mar 26, 2005 @ 02:55pm


	Some people just aren't responsible and shouldn't drink. These are the people that become alcoholics at any age. Drinking to get drunk, at the same time, is a stupid idea and an irrisponsible thing to do at any age. Having a single beer or a glass of wine at 14 or 16 years old, though, is not terribly harmful. Setting a drinking age encourages young people who already have certain problems to get drunk as an attempt to be rebellious. The same thing happens with smoking. Offline bentbacktulips · Community Member · Sat Mar 26, 2005 @ 07:37pm


	I am not suggesting that people should be running around drunk because nothing will happen. You're misinterpreting me. I just think that stating "You shouldn't drink when underage because things like that can happen. If you feel thus compelled to rick being the 16 yr old chick with the baby, then drink or whatnot." is just a bit overboard. Some people at 16 are more mature than people at 30. I'm not saying all people are. I'm not saying I am. And I'm not entirely promoting drinking. I am just saying that you're statement was a bit exaggerated. Getting drunk will not automatically mean you have sex. Offline strawberry jelly · Community Member · Sat Mar 26, 2005 @ 10:38pm


	As a bit of a side note, I personally would not have much aversion to (protected, because aids sucks) sex, while I have no interest in drinking. I don't think that drinking would make it happen, either. Offline bentbacktulips · Community Member · Sat Mar 26, 2005 @ 10:47pm


	Rightio, Eric here on a loner account from Dot. What it comes down to is personal responsibility; if someone has a full understanding of the risks involved with casual sex, does everything in their power to reduce these risks, and accept responsibility for their actions, then good on 'em, they should do what they want. But they must be serious in these considerations, for once something goes wrong and the female in this relationship gets pregnant, both individuals have a responsibility as a parent, and must make serious decisions about their child/child to be (whether they will raise them (and I do mean both parents, because no child deserves to be father or motherless), put them up for adoption, or get an abortion at the appropriate time (again, this choice is chalked up to responsibility, whether or not it is in all party's, including the offspring's, interests.)) The teenage underground is an extremely dangerous place, and it can leave you either wise beyond your years or battered and bleeding in a ditch with only the darkness and the memories of how you got to where you are to keep you company. Go into it with common sense, morals, and an understanding of the world outside this little slum, and you'll come out fine. Go in wantonly, and you'll find youself in serious trouble. Responsibility and common sense people. That's what it all comes down to. Offline meepit · Community Member · Mon Mar 28, 2005 @ 06:38am

	User Comments: [16]
	User Comments: [16]

Offline

I liked your favourite band AFTER they were popular

More Information

© Copyright 2003 - 2024 Gaia Interactive, Inc. All Rights Reserved.