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Here's a detailed account of the facebook war I've had with my English professor. xd


Post #1
You wrote on Feb 17, 2006 at 11:57 AM
Professor Kustesky, your Godfather accent was amazing! You should do an entire class with that accent! jk. I just realized yesterday that another great read, aside from LOTR, is The Last Unicorn (okay, I just watched the movie, but the screenplay was written by the author of the book, so its almost the same exact thing). I highly recommend it. More magic (much more magic) and less politics than LOTR, but just as insightful.

Post #2
1 reply
Stan Kustesky wrote on Feb 17, 2006 at 5:41 PM
Not good. But LOTR is NOT a political novel. That's something people project onto it. The politics YOU see is the politics you get; JRR did not put political statement into it.

Meanwhile, I read the Last Unicorn ages ago and it is fun to read. Whether or not the Godfather would approve of it is another matter entirely. Thanks for the compliments. He may show up as we progress through Malory, but no promises.

Post #3
1 reply
Evan Brown replied to Stan's post on Mar 1, 2006 at 10:30 PM
LOTR not a political novel?!?! My critically acclaimed research paper from last semester would suggest otherwise. I believe it was in the latest edition of Political Science Quarterly, and its scheduled to reappear in Bolivian Business & Politics next month; perhaps another glance at it would do you good, sir. My next article will be an expose on the religious mindwashing that takes place in your class, and the aggregious violations of the separation of church and state. You know what I'm talking about, you pastafarian. As a lifelong member of the Church of Pu-Pu Platter Day Saints, I've never felt so opressed. Good day professor.

Post #4
1 reply
Stan Kustesky replied to Evan's post on Mar 2, 2006 at 12:01 PM
My Dear Mr. Brown: Certainly LOTR is NOT a political novel. You religious freaks from oddball sects, who think you know evey little in and out of doctrine. To you I say, "Pu!" And "Pu!" again. Your paper was critically accalimed because several nasty little midgits YOU had sent forced me to read carefully and scrupulously, threatening my very being if I did not recognize the genius of your argument. Fortunately, I WAS able to see it, and as you yourself proved, one must mine the depths of LOTR to bring out the subtleties of JRR's postions. To advise someone to just treat it as a political treatise is a serious pedigogical flaw by which I cannot abide. You persisted, and the result? A thirteenth rate Bolivian rag comes panting to your door, offering a handful of de-valued pesos to add to your Cayman Islands thumb-print account! Pathetic! Had you accepted the True Religion, dined regularly at Olive Garden, and opened your mind, you would see the error of your ways and leave behind that poo you call Pu and see the light. My brain-washing is better than your brain-washing - by a long shot! Remember: the same midgits you used to threaten me can be turned on their(supposed) master! And they will be! You don't know what oppression is, Mr. Bown, until you have experienced the mighty menaces of marauding midgits, meadandering madly and mindlessly with midwashing mops! HA! You'll give up your bogus beliefs then - but it will be too late. You had your chance. Suffer the consequences. Good day to you, MISTER Brown.

Post #5
1 reply
You replied to Stan's post on Mar 29, 2006 at 1:21 PM
It's amazing how men can turn such a small comment (and I NEVER said that LOTR was a political novel, but there is a little bit of politics considering the fact that they were FIGHTING A WAR and there was a definite power struggle) into a serious pedigogical debate that doesn't even mean anything. In other words, you guys make a mountain out of a molehill. Let me just assert this, Professor Kustesky and Mister Brown, MEN ARE WEIRD which you two have proved through your meaningless dialogue. Now, I am in no position to understand men (although I think men don't understand themselves either), but I am entitled to my opinion. Bolivian rag, Church of Pu-Pu Platter, and Olive Garden have nothing to do with whether or not LOTR is a political novel, and neither of you have really said anything with all this ranting other than "You are stupid, so bow down to me and ph34r teh l33t 0n3.". In fact, it doesn't even matter if LOTR is a political novel or a mythology or a science fiction novel, because none of these words describe LOTR in its entirety. LOTR is everything and nothing (from a Sufi standpoint). Of course, we could all sit at Starbucks and argue about this for milennia, but we would never get past the Olive Garden on Richmond Road or the Cayman Islands while we try every drink on the Starbucks menu.

P.S. Like Tolkien, I choose my words carefully on that last post. It explicitly DOES NOT say "LOTR is a political novel" nor was I trying to assert that claim or even hint at it.

Post #6
2 replies
Stan Kustesky replied to your post on Mar 29, 2006 at 2:02 PM
My Dear Ms. Murad: Methinks possibly you are misunderstanding what is transpiring between that Brown person and myself. I made an innocent comment to you and he immediately jumped all over me - on the flimmsiest of pretexts. He THINKS he's an economist or something, or wants to be one. We let him into the seminar last Fall because his friends all told me he needed to watched at least an hour or so a day, the better for him not to try and buy a company or something when no one was looking. I tried to offer him sanctuary, but you see how he treats me? Making wild accusations that have no basis in fact. It's sad, really. As to your post, you do say that The Last Unicorn "has less politics than LOTR" - a statement which implies - AND HINTS AT - to me that there ARE politics in it. I said it is not a political novel. Mr. Brown's paper last semester dealt with the politics of LOTR - and he did it quite well, too, but I would never say that to him! He already thinks he's the CEO of W&M and I have no idea what he means at all about religious brainwashing. Who knows how he would respond if confronted! If this all seems weird it's because you weren't in the Fall Seminar. Now THAT was WEIRD! And Mr. Brown was one of the weirdest! You have no idea. Please do not take offense, HE started it! I'm just trying to teach a simple class, looking at a great book, and not take anyone's opinion away from them, least of all yours. If the truth be told, we weren't really saying ANYTHING of value in our exchange of comments. It is known as humor, or poking fun, or even satire - nothing intended to diminish your ideas or thinking. I guess you had to be there. Frankly, Evan and I understand each other perfectly; maybe it's women who need to do some thinking about men for a change. The Olive Garden, Bolivian rag, and Church of Pu-Pu Platter have EVERYTHING to do with it. AND I don't do Starbucks. We'll have to stick to the Olive Garden, where miracles have been known to happen.

Post #7
1 reply
You replied to Stan's post on Mar 29, 2006 at 4:10 PM
I'm sorry if I made a misunderstanding. I did not intend to. I was trying to poke my own humour in a cynical way, but I guess I did not succeed. I do agree with you that Mr. Brown is arrogant for thinking that his views are elevated over anyone else's just because he wrote some paper. Of course critics have their own critics.

Post #8
1 reply
You replied to your post on Mar 29, 2006 at 4:17 PM
And if I sounded like a feminist or something, I was not trying to do that either. Maybe I should have written people instead of men.......I don't understand humans in general.

Post #9
1 reply
Stan Kustesky replied to your post on Mar 29, 2006 at 4:36 PM
Of course you're a feminist! I can see it written all over you at the opposite end of the table. There's that little group of you down there, making notes, plotting how you're going to take over the college. HAH! I'm on to you, Ms. Najiba, and not a moment too soon. The word will get out. I finally figured out why women have to go to the restroom in threes and fours - that's where you hold your meetings about taking over the world. Even in fancy restaurants, too. Why do women always ask their dates/boy friends/husbands for change when they go to restrooms? Dues! They are paying dues to the Feminists of the World Club, to which they all belong. They are trying to take over - but they won't succeed. We're on to you, and all the other ladies who think this is a Big Secret! We know - and we're going to tell everyone! You know how I learned about this? It's all in LOTR!!! Tolkien knew EVERYTHING!

Post #10
1 reply
You replied to Stan's post on Mar 29, 2006 at 4:46 PM
MWAHAHAHAHA!!! So what if we are trying to take over the world? Who wouldn't? You MEN have had your time, now it's OURS!!!!

Post #11
Stan Kustesky replied to your post on Mar 29, 2006 at 5:19 PM
OOOOOO! I'm scared! I think I'm just gonna run and hide, so the Big Bad Feminists don't get me. I may just hide under the covers and never come out again.


NOT!

Post #12
1 reply
Evan Brown replied to Stan's post on Apr 8, 2006 at 11:24 AM
"We let him into the seminar last Fall because his friends all told me he needed to be watched at least an hour or so a day..."

My friends told you I needed to be watched an hour a day? That's completely erroneous. The judge was very clear about the sanctions, and my parole officer only requires me to check in with him every other Tuesday. And yes, despite your best efforts, I will be assuming the role of President, Chairman, and CEO of the College of William and Mary, Inc. My first move will be the abolishment of pumpkin pastries perpared by proselytizing professors who perpetuate the persecution of Pu-Pu Platter products. You have been warned.

Post #13
1 reply
Stan Kustesky replied to Evan's post on Apr 8, 2006 at 6:52 PM
Oh spare me the pusillanimous platitudes of pious Pu-Pu Platter propaganda, young Brown! Such dastardly derring-do doth dump dignity down the drain. Fie on your flagrant flippancy! President? Hah! and Hah again! The Pu-Pu Platter products derived from your Ptomaine Temple present nothing but problems for all who partake. Pathetic! And you call yourself President. When I see the judge this week, he'll learn first hand from me what a mountebank you are! He thinks you're studying and learning; won't he be surprised to hear that you are mounting a malicious and mendacious mockery of my menial, meage and most magnificent methods of moral munificence. You are a prodigal piffler. Pshaw! Be prepared, Pu-Pu Pusher!

Post #14
You replied to Stan's post on Apr 23, 2006 at 7:47 PM
Can I be the Vice-President?



And in case you don't think this was seriously a war, consider this: my professor called me after my second post to discuss what I had said! Now that is hardcore! (Although I didn't see what the big deal was....and I don't hate guys, I just thought those two were being kinda stupid.) 3nodding