In a year or two, I will be going off to college, hopefully the one of my choice. I won't devulge it so I don't jinx myself. ^^
Anyway, I just go to thinking about how fast those years have gone by. I was a freshman, immature and elated. Then I became a sophmore, slightly terrorized by the idea of boyfriends and social circles. Before I know it, here I am, a fairly matured and world-weary junior. I'm rather shocked.
I could have sworn that just yesterday I was entering for the first time onto the high school's grounds, but now I'm looking at colleges with a frantic desperation. What's going on? Where did all my time go? I remember hearing my mom say, "Don't worry, hun, you have at least three years." Well, not anymore and it's sort of disheartening.
I'm going to miss my slightly rushed delinquency. I'm going to miss the old days in which being immature was okay, since I was at the age. No more crying and whining to my parents, I'm all on my own, now. In fact, I feel exhilirated and afraid for the independence. For the last 12-13 years of my life, I've been securely chained to my bedpost. It's only recently I've been "testing my wings." At one side, I get to taste that freedom and it's intoxicating, on the other...the freedom brings me apprehension. But perhaps I'm just thinking too much into it.
I remember that I couldn't wait to get high school over and done with. By my second month at the facility, I was raring to get a taste of college. But now? I'm sort of holding onto the hands of my high school tightly. More than tightly, I have a death grip on the poor thing. I'm nervous and full of doubts and it scares me. As a usually confident person, perhaps my shell of authority is cracking? Better stick the cement on there, then.
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The Shadows Are Alive
The wonders and worries of a little girl tainted by the shadows.
Because you know what?
They really are alive.
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