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It all started with a computer...

I'm going to try to get back into the daily, or weekly journal habit. Because I really miss writing these. xd

I'm going to see if I can sum up the past few months...

Went to Florida, moved here, whatever. Going to IADT Tampa for a Bachelor's in "Digital Movie Making" which I renamed to Digital Video Production. Anyone who asks me what my major is, I say Digital Video Production. Most people accept it, people who are filling out forms always need to clarify with me by what I mean, since there's a program called Digital Production, which is the associate's version of my program.

Your fault for calling it the retarded "Digital Movie Making", people. Your fault.

My first classes were Screenwriting & Storyboarding, Interpersonal Communication, Cinematography, and Intro to Computer Systems. Tested out of Intro to computer systems (Ah man, that class is a joke), and once I saw what a waste of time Cinematography was, I tried to test out of that, too.

But, apparently my four credits of Mass Media/Video Pro in highschool weren't good enough, so I have to come to a four hour class and watch a movie and read out of a book.

Hey, guys. If you don't know what a pan is, or you can't figure out what a pan is by yourself, YOU NEED SOME BLOODY HELP.
Plus, all we do is watch movies. Wouldn't it be more beneficial to, oh, I don't know, DISSECT the movie? Maybe somehting like "-pauses movie- what an awesome crane move! Hey class, what makes this an awesome crane move?" Or, hell, how about watchingt he "Making of" featurettes?

All we do is watch Gandy go "This is my favorite movie because of blah blah" and then we watch the movie, and then he goes, "Yep, that's an awesome movie. Some blahblah stuff." And then we leave. WTF.

Interesting? Moderately. Entertaining? Sometimes. Educational? NOTSOMUCH. Worth 1.5k? NO. NO. AND SOME MORE NO.

I'd get more education with less money if I had a netflix account and listened to the Directory's commentary. That's how sad this is.

Interpersonal Communications is a psychology class. I thought it would be hard to screw up a class where I actually liked the subject, but apparently it isn't. Take Psychology, add one really old guy and sixty students, and kablam! You have the worst psychology class EVER.

All he ever does is blab on and on about s**t worth nothing. The book is more interesting than he is. It sucks, really. I think he'd make a slightly better teacher if our class weren't so big.

Screenwriting & Storyboarding is definately the kind of college course I was expecting, though. The professor is cool, and knows his s**t. He gived heavy homework assignments, and he doesn't go easy on you because he knows it's the ******** industry, and if you can't do it right in the classroom, you ain't gettin' hired in the industry.
The thing I'm disappointed in is the students. All they ever do is complain about how much they write. Long time readers know about my Writing Workshop class. The students in Screenwriting & Storyboarding are exactly the same. Maybe even whinier. It's sad. I mean, in High school, it was kind of okay because High school doesn't really matter worth a s**t.

BUT WE'RE IN COLLEGE NOW. If you wanted easy, go buy yourself a degree. Seriously. If you want to complain about writing a three page character bio, or complain about why the hell a character bio couldn't POSSIBLY be needed, go ******** yourself. No, seriously.

I'm paying 1.5k per class to ******** learn here, and it's no wonder I'm, even after missing midterm day, am better than you. When I graduate, I'm not going to write screenplays, and I'm not going to draw storyboards or line scripts. But you don't hear me arguing with the prof about how needless it is. So shut the ******** up.

I love how, when the prof isn't around, they talk s**t about him behind his back. Last Friday, the Prof was late, and they called him an a*****e, how he had the nerve to make them do their work over or rewrite their scripts because THEY SUCKED HORRIBLE a**.

I think most people fail Jim's class not because he's strict, but that youth these days are just lazy ********.

Roommates. Ah. There's a subject to be breached. Tasha, she's sterotypical black girl. Turns 18 in a week. I like her, she's cool. But she's kind of shallow. Not in the rude way. But like. She is almost exactly like me, except that she puts on this show. For example, one time we were talking, and I mentioned how I'm sensitive to the bass in her car and I don't like rap. I caught her say really quick "I only listen ot that crap so loud because others will know I'm cool.' Or something ot that effect.
You're cool for who you are. If you're making friends out of this hard shell you've got goin' on, then you need to grow up.

Rachel, her dad's a doctor and she's rich. She has the gall to think she's the boss of the apartment. We used to get along okay until the fatal "couch incident." I came home slightly drunk, half-asleep, and she was there, sitting on the couch.
The apartment looked different.
She says "My parents just got me this stuff, what do you think of it?"
And I said "The couch covers look ghetto, there are placemats on the bar when we don't even have chairs for the bar, why do we need a lamp with a timer, and the table cloth thing is too long."
Not quite that bad, but just as bad sounding.
BUT IT GETS BETTER.
Her mouth goes agape, she is surprized. Everyone around her is stunned in shock.
And I go. "What? You asked what I thought. Not my fault if you don't like it." And I went to bed.

It's been a month and the couch covers are comfy, but they never stay on the couch, so they're just in the way. The table cloth is better because I folded it a bit, and the placemats are on the table(where they should be).
The lamp has been unplugged.

We get a new roommate, Shayla. I don't know her very well, but she's 22 and she's cool. She's nice and refined. My first impression of her really sucked, though. When she was moving in, she had SO MUCH s**t. It took her four days to move in. She had so much crap. One of the days, I managed to go by her bedroom, and saw that half of the room was filled with shoeboxes. Yes. Shoeboxes. She brought in exercising equipment, tons of clothes, and other stuff. My first impression of her was a materialistic dickwad, but I'm glad I got over that, because she's cool.

I get a new computer, it doesn't work, I starve myself for no good reason, and get Will(the bf) I ******** because he won't stop talking about this girl, Theresea, and how he needs sex. Part of me was guilty because I wasn't there and he was all "Oh I'm not going out with anybody because I'm totally dedicated to you." Part of me knew the long distance relationship wouldn't work out anyway. And part of me just wanted him to shut up about how sex depraved he was, and how he would shut up about Thereasa. It was obvious they were crushing on eachother, so I was just like. "Go out with her, ******** her, and we can be swingers." It worked for a while, but eventually he dumped me for her. I should've saw it coming. Meh. I'm not really that upset about it, which is surprizing.

In any event, a week without the computer is getting to me. Usually I just retreat to my room and type and s**t, but without that, I have nothing.
So I was hanging out at a friends' apartment to "get away from the roommates" so to speak. And I was doing it A LOT. The friends' house is Zack, Junior, Norris, and Kenneth's. I'm friends with Zack and Norris.

One time When I went over, and happened to be starving myself, Kenneth offered to cook me food. I said I'd take him up on it. So I did. And he was running a soup kitchen for a week or so. Tasha was telling me about how Kenneth only used people, and she hated him. I said he was giving me free food, so I didn't care. I was getting the better end of the deal.

Later Kenneth asks for some money. Five bucks. Swears he'll pay me back tomorrow. I say fine, and knowing he probably wouldn't pay it back because I trust Tasha, figured 5 USD wasn't a huge price to pay for the awesomely cooked meals I was getting anyway.
He comes over, I give him the 5 bucks, and I ask what it's for. He says weed. I say "Okay, since I said I'd give this to you over the phone, I will. But next time, it's not going to happen."
Week or two later, Norris calls me and says Kenneth has my 5 bucks, and that there's pork chops. I come over with my own plate, expecting to take some home.

Kenneth treats me like an a** to repay me, and looks at my plate and says "There aren't any pork chops left." when there's a PILE of pork chops that nobody's eating right next to me. I get the message.

Kenneth has treated me like s**t since.
The guy just doesn't know how to use people correctly, is all.

Two weeks a go, Zack and I are watching some anime, and all of the sudden he goes. "I feel like getting inebriated." And I was like... "Huh?"
And he says. "What do you feel about that?"
And I replied, "Well, I think I'm fine with it, but I'll be honest and tell ya I forgot what the word meant."

Anyway, it ends up we go out and buy some beer and get drunk off our asses. Well. I do. He just gets tipsy. See, I downed two bottles of Mike's hard lemonade in less than a minute. Was working on my third by the 10th minute, and since I eat so little these days, and I drank it so fast, I got piss a** drunk quick.
And unlike normal, I guess I am just really comfortable around Zack, because I got a little pushy violent. Not in the bad way, but in the friendly playing around way. I used to be really physical like that in middle school, then I went through the emo "don't touch me" phase and stopped. So it was kinda good going back to that.

Anyway. Zack was drinking vodka, and I stole the glass from him and downed half of it.

Yeah.

About 5 minutes later, I ask Zack to not get drunk because I really need him to look after me, because I don't feel right. I've never been quite this drunk before, and the room's spinning a little too much for me.
He says okay and finished his cig outside. I call will and plead for him to tell me how to get the room to not spin so much. He says concentrate on something. And I say I can't, because I can hardly keep my eyes open.

Zack comes back in, and then time gets blurry for me, but at some point I start throwing up my life's blood, and don't stop until three hours later. Zack mentioned how, in all his life(He's 28), he's never seen anyone throw up so much as I have at once.

Yay me.

So remember this, kiddies. "Beer before liquor, never been sicker." Is a very prominent warning that YOU SHOULD NOT IGNORE.

I was really weak for the rest of the week. Couldn't eat anything for two days, missed one day of school, ate like a ******** elephant after that. I went to the grocery store so many times when I started eating I'm broke again, so I re-started the starving cycle.
Which is followed by the drunken cycle.

But luckily, THE Q WILL NEVER DRINK VODKA EVER AGAIN.
Remember that, because I am steadfast in it.
Q NO LIKE-A DA VODKA.

And you won't give Q vodka either, unless you'd like to see Q throw up for three hours straight.

And trust me, I would've either drowned in my own puke or suffocated by not being able to puke it up, because I couldn't physically move. Zack had to lean me over the trashcan. Zack had to give me water so I wouldn't throw up blood since there was nothing left in my stomach, and Zack had to make sure I sat up.

My eyes were closed the whole time because any time I opened them they rolled in the back of my head. My circulation from waist down was nowhere to be found, and my arms fell asleep, as well.

I think I may have had alcohol poisoning, considering what I went through, but thank god when I felt weird I said babysit me, because the situation could've turned out to be a helluva lot worse.

But onward.

week after that or so, I get depressed and start wanting to quit college. Call Will, rant to him about it. He says call the parents because they're the money-givers and they'll talk me out of quitting better than he can. I call the parents and end up saying that I think all my problems are stemming from not having a private room(I sleep in the same room as Tasha right now).

So we have this big suicide discussion as we also do, since my mom thinks that any time I complain about anything I'm going to kill myself.

A few days later, for no real reason at all, my mom calls me at 10am (she knows I don't get up until AT LEAST 12) and decides to talk with me about the private room thing again.

She says that if we get a private room, the rent will be astronomical and we can't afford it, so we were trying to explore other options. I said "Well if I get another apartment outside of CHS with my own roommate(s), will it be cheaper?"
And I also said something about how my roommates drink and party every weekend, and it was noisy and kept me up or whatever, and that's why I need a private room.

Well, I get off the phone and go to the bathroom. And when I get out, Tasha is GONE. She was sleeping before. Then Rachel calls for me and starts going "We OBVIOUSLY have a problem" in that stereotypical rich white girl boss voice of hers.

So I try and explain that I don't have a problem, that I only wanted a private room, didn't want to move out, and that private rooms were too expensive so I was exploring more options.

Honestly, I was more pissed with the fact that Tasha ran crying to Rachel about a HALF A CONVERSATION on a PRIVATE PHONECALL without talking to me first. Or, god forbid, keep it to herself.

I mean, if they hate me so much, why are they so worried about me moving out? Wouldn't it be like a "good riddance"?

Well anyway, things get more uneasy between Rachel and I. And Tasha's fine but now I lost trust in her, so I don't talk to her.
Rachel brings up the damn phone call like every other day, each time getting more pissed about it.

Look. Is it your ONLY thought about my personal life? Do you sit and think about that phone call 24/7 JUST so you can take it MORE PERSONALLY?

So yesterday she brings it up for about the third time, and I finally break.
She mentions that it's unfair I would bring up that they "drink and party every weekend" when I "do they exact same thing, just someplace else."

Which I don't. For one, I'm a relatively quiet drunk. Zack even told me I was quiet when I was throwing up. Second, I don't do it every weekend.
Third, I don't care that they drink. Which I told them multiple times.
So I cracked. I said "WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO, RACHEL? What did you want me to say to my mom? I want a private room because I'm a spoiled b***h? Or did you want me to say I need the room because you're a little noisy? WHAT WOULD YOU HAVE DONE?"

Rachel and I have ignored eachother since.

Honestly, the risk for getting worse roommates was too great before, and that's why I didn't want to move out. But with Shayla moving out this quarter, and Rachel pissing me off more and more, I think it's a risk worth taking now.
I might just change roommates.

But it kind of sucks because.. I'm a girl.
And the girls at IADT are either fashion designers, or Interior Designers. Or Animators.

Fashion Designers are usually materialistic brats. Interior Designers are slightly more levelheaded, but tend to be way older, smoke, and drink a lot. They scream "I'm classier than you."
Animators are just ******** weird. They're either "Haha! I can draw and you can't!" or "YAY ANIME! <insert random japanese word here!>" Which is just retarded.

My choice in roommates is very limited, and no matter who I get I will, 99% of the time, be the oddball.
We can't interview our roommates before we move, so It's gambling for sanity, here.

Last night, I said I felt like getting drunk. Shayla was going to go buy the beer. I stopped her at the door and said "Do you want me to pay for it?"
Rachel is over at the table, and she tells me "Why make her buy it when you can just go over to your friend's place and drink there?" In that prissy "I'm-better-than-you" rich b***h white girl voice. The kind you get from the cheerleaders in high school.
I simply say because he's out of town, and give Shayla the money.

I want to choke Rachel.

That's pretty much caught up. I guess I'll talk more later; your eyes are probably bleeidng now.