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According to my unreliable memory, I experienced my first piggy back in ninth grade during our graduation retreat.

As a final attempt to unite the leaving class, it was and still is a tradition at my old school to have the grade nines go on a retreat. When my year came around, my class was taken to a small centre where we were asked to do a series of challenges that supposedly increased the bondage between ourselves.

One of these activities was called “Stepping Stones” or something similar. We had fabric tiles that served as the only place we could place our feet. With the limited number of these “stepping stones,” we were forced to think of alternatives to all walking alone. There were several teams, the teammates of which were chosen randomly, and my team consisted of people who I hardly recall. We decided to use the method of piggy backing.

The first person to give me a piggy back is someone who I always called Tomi. His real name is Tomirej but to this day, I have never called him that. A playful spirit he is, but I wasn’t on too familiar of terms with him. He was the person who introduced me to piggy backs and I still love them.

My second piggy back ride was also during a retreat. Rather than a farewell gathering or sorts, my second retreat was to welcome the grade tens to my current high school. The grade ten students, because there were so many, were split to different days. I don’t remember which day I went on, but I do remember it was on the same day as number nine.

Number nine was a character I was rather fond of. I hold no ill will against him now, only a few regrets here and there. One could possibly say I held special feelings for him and one would not be lying. What I felt for him was not love, but it was indeed special. If you’re at all interested, he has been mentioned several upon several times in the archives of this journal.

My group of grade ten students was spilt even further into groups, the teammates of which were divided based on birthdays. Number nine’s birthday was in the same month as my own, but we were separated. I like to say it was due to fate, but I’m sure I willed against it. I was hopeful, but I knew my hope was futile. He stood beside me as we were being counted. He was the last member of his team before they restarted the count at me. To say my heart dropped would be an extreme exaggeration. He is but a figment of my past.

Without number nine in my group, I participated in several activities, some of which were similar to those I took part in during my grade nine retreat. One of these similarities included a game of “Stepping Stones.” I was piggy backed by... someone whom I forgotten the face and name of. I’m sure it was a boy and I’m sure he must be a good person. I find it extremely shocking that I can’t recall such an important detail.

Just yesterday, Friday, May 23, 2014, I received my third piggy back. This piggy back was given to me by No’C, or Nine o’ Clock. No’C is a character in my life that has been mentioned in this journal sometime in the past. I believe it was February 20, 2014, when No’C first made it into my journal. I could check, but I highly doubt anyone would want to confirm my dates. I’m pretty sure that was the date I saw when I was checking my entries a while back.

No’C is someone who I instantly took interest in. We were partners for an activity in my Bio 20 class and we are neighbours during choir practice. We were strangers once upon a time, but our relationship has taken incredible strides forward. I’m glad to know such a cool person.

Basically, No’C and I were staying up one night. Specifically, this night was the night of May 5, 2014, six days after we started talking on Facebook and seven days after I returned from my school trip to Whistler, BC. On this night, we were seeing who would sleep first. We made a bet with personalized rewards for the winner. My request was to be piggy backed. I won, of course, being close friends with the dusking hours of the night and the dawning hours of the morning. With my victory, I was granted a piggy back ride, one I claimed only yesterday.

On Fridays, my school dismisses all students almost one and a half hours earlier than the regular dismissal time. This means that rather than being released at 3:30PM, we’re set free at 2:04PM. Typically, I would rush to the bus stop where I would catch the number three bus and head off to piano lessons. I would arrive there incredibly early and begin my theory homework or, if I was a good piano student and had my homework done, I would sleep to get some desperately needed rest. Other times, I would eat my lunch because I never find the time to eat at school, what with club activities, meetings, homework, and test preparations.

In previous years, when I attended my old school, I was dismissed at 3:03PM. I would quickly gather my books and shove them into my backpack. From here, I would speed walk to the number three bus stop and wait to catch a bus as I headed to piano lessons. My piano lessons started and still start at 4:00PM on Fridays.

Yesterday, a Friday, I did not eat my lunch during lunch. I did not do my theory homework as a good piano student would. I did sleep—something I’ve been doing guiltily lately—so I was not too tired. Had yesterday been a typical day, I’d have rushed off to board the number three bus, arrived at the house of my piano teacher, do my theory homework, eat my lunch, and if I had time, I would sneak in a short nap. Yesterday, however, was most definitely not a typical day.

The day before yesterday—that is, Thursday, May 22, 2014—No’C told me something I regard very highly. The amount of courage it must have taken No’C to tell me what No’C told me is commendable.

No’C, if you ever read this, surely you remember how I reacted to your words. The state of surprise, ‘twas a pleasant surprise, still lingers in my soul.

As a sort of compensation, I delivered my own words the following day—that is, yesterday, Friday, May 23, 2014. But, hold on, I’m skipping ahead too much.

I was dismissed two or three minutes early during fourth period (school only consists of four periods for me now), so I reached my locker at an earlier time. At an earlier time, I finished gathering my books into my backpack whose seams are undeniably tearing. For a longer time, I waited to briefly meet No’C.

Ever since a few days ago (or perhaps it’s been a few weeks...?), No’C and I have become very close friends. We bid farewells to each other after school.

For the past two days, we’ve been welcoming each other in the morning. No’C arrives to school an hour before first period actually starts. I arrive at school approximately twenty minutes before school starts. For the past two days, we’ve been spending these twenty minutes together, filling it with dorky conversations and terrible puns.

Anyhow, yesterday, I was waiting for No’C after school. Rumours have been spreading about No’C and me, but I honestly cannot care less. Rumours are an unreliable source of information. For those who spread them, I consider shameful. For those who believe in them, I pity wholeheartedly for their mislead faith.

As has become the usual, I met up with No’C. I don’t recall what we were specifically talking about. I just know that we were where we were when No’C told me those extremely important words, that extremely pleasant surprise, just two days ago. This place I call “the staircase” and No’C always complains about how I specify the noun with “the” instead of generalizing it with “a.”

We were alone in the staircase for brief seconds before I opened a door to the outside world. Behind these doors stood No’C former schoolmates who are also No’C’s current circle of friends. They were planning on hanging out after school. I’m assuming they did this often, every week or more perhaps, because it seemed like an effective last-minute plan.

No’C drifted away instantly, or so I thought. I turned and began my journey to the number three bus stop when I heard footsteps approaching me from behind. I knew it was No’C even without having to look. I doubt it was the power of close friendship as logic would have served fine. With No’C being my only familiar companion in the vicinity, it makes sense to assume No'C would be the one who dares get near me.

I don’t remember how it exactly played out from here. I just recall that eventually, No’C and I were chilling on the grass just outside “the staircase.” We spent a good fifty minutes there doing what I can define as almost absolutely nothing (said not in an insulting tone but rather implying that we had no real purpose).

A half hour after the Friday school dismissal bell rang, most of the students had already gone home or out with friends. No’C, too, was supposed to go with friends and I was supposed to be on a bus to my piano teacher’s house. The two of us, however, were still at school for who knows what reasons.

“You know I still owe you a piggy back ride, right?” No’C said, or so I remember.

“How can I forget?” I reply, or at least that's what I thought.

No’C has owed me a piggy back ride since the fifth of this month. It has been nineteen days since this agreement was sealed. What, you might be thinking, delayed the pay so much? Well, the rumours were spreading like wildfire to a point where even my sister, two years older than me, heard word of it. No’C and I didn’t want to add fuel to the rumours so we decided to heavily limit time spent in each other’s company. Piggy backs, therefore, were more or less put on hold.

Yesterday, no rumour starters or rumour believers were left at the school a half hour after the dismissal bell rang. We weren’t being watched by the tinted views of others. We were, or at least we believed we were, free for once.

Freedom can without a doubt be abused. I hope a piggy back ride doesn’t count as abusing liberty.

Anyhow, just before we were going to part ways, No’C brought up the piggy back ride. Since the initial bet, I have earned several more piggy back rides from No’C. Some of which were as simple as:

“I doubt you can carry me. I’m super heavy.”

“Wanna bet?”

“Yeah.”

Back to my story, No’C placed No’C’s bag on the ground and walked a little ahead. No’C made a gesture for me to get on No’C’s back. I was hesitant at first. Oh readers, I was so hesitant! It was going to be my first piggy back ride where I didn’t have to cross an imaginary river on makeshift stepping stones! And I was nervous because what if someone saw?

Between me and No’C, we hold tons of secrets. For weeks, our knowing each other was a giant secret. I don’t know when we started meeting in public. I suppose either hiding was too painful or No’C is just a lot braver than I am.

After what felt like a long period of vocal silence, I dropped my bunny bag and my backpack beside No’C’s bag.

My bunny bag is a small pouch bought for me by my sister. It’s shaped as a bunny, or at least it’s supposed to be. In it, I carry all my valuables and more often than not, I have my bunny bag with me. I only let go of it when I’m at home or when both my hands are other occupied. In either instance, my bunny bag is always within reach.

Without my deteriorating backpack and my beloved bunny bag, I took shelter behind a handrail that outlined a pavement walkway that leads out from the school’s staircases. For a few minutes, I stood there rendering as much courage as I can possibly muster.

I don’t remember what I said or when I started talking or if I ever stopped talking. One moment, I was staring at No’C back and the next moment I was standing just behind No’C. Nervous still and completely unaware of what to do, No’C told me to put my hands on No’C’s shoulders. I did. I don’t know why I did.

I mean, any guidance was appreciated. I didn’t know if I was allowed to touch No’C, to be honest. I didn’t know if I could allow myself to touch No’C. I’m not usually the type to engage in physical contact. However, yesterday was not the usual day.

After my hands were where they were directed to be, I felt lost. It was an odd sense of detachment, not to No’C but to the world. There I was, alone with No’C, about to receive a piggy back ride for a bet made weeks ago. There I was, touching another human (or perhaps I should say “alien”) with full intent. There I was, doing something I could only ever dream of. There I was. Why was I there?

From here, my memory begins to fade.

I remember eventually having my arms wrapped around No’C neck, something I did purely for support as piggy back rides can be a little unstable at times.

I don’t remember when I jumped, but I do remember jumping. I remember closing my eyes at first because the whole thing was a new experience and I didn’t know if I should open my eyes.

I remember opening my eyes and seeing the reflection of me and No’C in a window on the school building. In this reflection, I saw myself let go of No’C and reach up, proudly claiming title as “the taller one” for once.

It was previously decided that the piggy back ride would last from where we started to a tree across the grassy area and all the way back. I remember No’C taking me around the tree and I remember No’C threatening to run.

Did No’C ever run? I don’t know. Right after I heard No’C say No’c was going to run, I tightened my grip and blocked everything out. I suppose you could say it was a defence mechanism.

When I reopened my eyes, No’C was nearing our starting place. I don’t know what emotions went through my mind. Maybe nothing, maybe everything. Who knows?

No’C faked to fall several times. Every time, my heart would race and my whole being would be filled with adrenaline. Every time No’C recovered a stable position, my heart would still race but I would be stupidly relieved.

When the two of us reached out determined destination, I’ll be completely honest in saying that I wanted to stay on longer. I’d have said “forever,” but forever is a long time. I regrettably got off, but my mind wasn’t in a mood of regret. Rather, I was extremely happy. At the same time, I wanted to run away and hide. At the same time, I wanted to jump back on and leave the whole world behind. At the same time, I wondered what No’C was thinking.

I remember finally parting ways, picking up my bunny bag and backpack and walking in the opposite direction of No’C down the sidewalk. I remember elongated farewells and I remember not yet wanting to leave.

As I was walking to piano lessons, my mind was completely occupied with thoughts of No’C and No’C’s back. I wonder if that’s odd. I harbour such strange thoughts, don’t I? I turned around one last time to see No’C begin skipping and then sprinting. At that moment, I was struck with an odd sense of “hey, I do that, too.”

I started talking to myself then. I had to release my thoughts or else I’m sure I’d have gone insane.

“No’C is so much like me,” I thought “similar enough to relate to, but different enough to stay interesting.”




And that’s all I have to say for now. Thanks for reading my entry, mysterious reader! I’ll be writing another entry eventually~ Until then, have a go at guessing what song these lyrics come from:

I have waited a lifetime
Spent my time so foolishly
But now that I’ve found you
Together we’ll make history

It’s an old song, but I find it super catchy, haha. As always, comment the title and artist and a reward shall be granted~! That is, if you’re a fellow gaian, like myself.

Now then, I shall get going. Have an absolutely wonderful day if the sun’s out and about. If not, I bid you the sweetest of dreams because nightmares are bleh. Bye byes~! yum_puddi