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I've noticed that my circle of friends has been growing as of late. While some may retain the thought that that is something to be happy for, to relish for, I do not. While I do enjoy the company of friends and I do welcome conversations with them, I am a man who adores small amounts of consorts, and abhors the mere thought of being surrounded by too many. I luxuriate in a simple, small assortment of people whom I can say are dear to me, and when there are too many, I feel myself to be strained and often overcrowded. The work to converse with every single one of them turns into a chore rather than a fun thing to do, and I begin to find myself tired when trying to equally divide myself among them. A small circle of twenty friends, that's what I enjoy the most. That's what I savor and love. In real life (I hate how the things online are considered to be fake, while things that take place in reality are real. It's demeaning to the entire internet base and those who pride themselves in careers dealing with computers. I plan to go into computers as a profession and for what I do on it to be called fake is a grave insult, and shall be appended someday, hopefully within our generation.) I have a humble circle of friends, their size is about ten, give or take. I enjoy that, of course I talk with others, friends of their own, or just other people whom I know. On Gaia, I have over four hundred friends, some of whom I haven't talked to in years, while others I talk to every day or week. Now the reason for having so large a number is so that if one person whom I call a friend happens to not be on for awhile, or have quit, I can talk to others. Have a small group of friends can sometimes grow tedious as you've heard all their topics and learned all about them already. Things grow mundane and soon that person(s) bore you to a point where you even begin to avoid them. I've yet to experience that for I rarely spend much time talking to a single person for too long. After maybe a month or two of talking, we meet new people, new friends, new things to create a gap between us and, before we know it, that friend has been replaced without either of you ever realizing it. So I keep a large number so that I can mix up it when things get dull or awkward with other friends, they're interchangeable. Friends are not the same as close friends, mind you, for close friends are of a completely different sort and are not grouped with those who would be best known as casual friends that I talk to every once in awhile. A large amount of friends also means that I have more friends to remember, and, seeing as I'm a forgetful person, I tend to forget to talk to them, which is a flaw of mine. Anyway, I'm doing my best to talk to more people and someday learn to enjoy a large amount of friends. I don't know when that day will come, but I'll work towards it.
This was typed mostly to excuse my lack of interactions with friends recently. Why I talk to few among hundreds. I added you all to my friends list for a reason, because I enjoy your company, there is not one person on that list whom I find boring or annoying, for they would have never been added in the first place. So do not think yourselves to be avoided by me, for that is not the case in the least. It's just that I tend to stick around older friends, and, even though you're on my friends list, I take time to warm up to new friends. I will try to someday talk to everyone and not find myself the least overcrowded. I will talk to you all again in due time. Shyness is another factor in this, it's why I find it hard to start conversations. So my friends that I talk to more often usually tend to be the ones that always start the conversations. If you find me to be boorish because I don't talk to you, please know that it is not out of rudeness that I do not speak to you but that I merely do not know how to start a conversation with you.
There is one more factor, which is probably the one I fear sharing, but I know I must, for hopefully the mention of it will prove to help me in overpowering it and live free of its threatening grasp. Less friends means less chances for me to get hurt and to be betrayed. Perhaps I merely convinced myself that everything I've written above is true due to my inability to admit to this one. I do not know.
Some may find what I typed to be rude, and as I read over it, I, too, find it to be a bit graceless, and for that, you have my apologies. I did not mean for it to come out in such a way that it may offend or anger someone.

Thanks for reading, please know that I will try my hardest to overcome my phobia of large amounts of friends and interactions, and that hopefully we can all talk as if we have no cares in the world.