Disclaimer: I use to cut, I haven't for years. I do not encourage cutting, however I do say that if you must do it, please use sterile needles/razors/knives. Please do not reopen wounds and always cut in places that are safe. I did a great amount of harm to my body by not following these and I wish someone had at least told me to be safe in what I was doing, because at the time I was not going to stop if you told me. There is always a way to hurt yourself, always a way to gain that feeling. By writing this I am simply expressing how it made me feel in my experiences I'm not saying it is how everyone who cuts feels or that it is how you will feel if you decide to.
Mom wasn't there
Dad didn't care
as the blood ran red
I laid in my bed
no longer crying tears
it once was one of my greatest fears
cut up,
cut down
about to rupt
its all sound
so good
so wrong
this is the song
red on my arm
red on my leg
do you see that red?
Never cut in plain sight
couldn't let out the fright
of the knife I held so tight
till it let the release out right
everytime was the same
everytime i felt no pain
the fear was there
it wasn't clear
here I am, I won't cry
for my own death tonight
See that blood?
I caused that.
tastes so good
I know its so wrong
drink what comes out of the wound
open it so you can do it again
best taste in the world
walk around with your arm in your mouth
sucking out that final drop
never cut down too south
can't reach, lust about to pop
pleasure comes in red
pleasure is when I'm dead
see that blood?
that is mine
see that cut?
I did that
Mommy aren't you proud?
Daddy don't be so loud
I'm doing all I can
You can't ban
all that I love
its what I need
adicted
worse than an adict
I need it
not fine without it
get the shakes
get the quackes
time to cut again
time to bleed again
time to love again
time to feel alive again
time to be again
clean
clean for a year
clean for two
clean as a bear
in need of a rue
the scars have healed
no one believes
the words I carved into me
smiles and hearts
little holidays arts
the blood is no longer here
the blood is no longer clear
I'm an adict
fighting every day
to not cut at it
and suck it all away
Fight as I may
Its difficult
to fight everyday
everyday
everyday
everyday
everyday
everyday
everyday
everyday
its a fight
everyday
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me, and my life
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