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I didn't ask for anything this year, mostly due to me being older now. Plus My mom came to me a week ago telling me to not be home or as she said in exact words.

" I would really enjoy it if your not around that day..."

Yeah it kinda has been stuck in my head, it's just. Wow pretty blunt don't you think mom? Kinda how it was with Thanksgiving, but I think that made me cry even harder that time. I made them dinner that night, and my mom ask what I was doing, why I was still home, and to basically from there leave.

Really, Telling me to leave on thanksgiving?!

So I took all the food I made and paid for to Spencer's house were his family invited me to stay over. They really enjoyed my food, and I was able to help around the kitchen. He kept trying to make me relax and let him cook but I couldn't, it's not in my nature so it turned into a team effort to make a thanksgiving meal for his family.

Sorry back to subject...x-mas...

So I already had gifts for everyone, and my mom told me to leave. Well about 2 days ago my Step-dad flew in from India, finally getting home from a business trip. He was gone for about a week, but I heard last night thanks to the little vent in my room that is connected to the living room.
Basements do have a advantage...
My mom and dad was arguing, my dad was asking why she didn't want me to spend Christmas with them, and of course she had no real answer. So she agreed to letting me stay in the house last night

(even though I pay $300/m to live here for a couple months, til march.)

So I slept in and rush upstairs, everyone is almost done opening presents. They even opened mine too, which was a disappointment cause I wanted to see their faces.

Dad= Bob Marley tee
Mom= A book from Cross Roads
Jada= glass cat with a goldfish inside
Kayla= gold Opel necklace

My sisters were so excited to see me, Kayla literally jumped up seeing me and screamed my name giving me a huge hug my guts could burst. xDD

I exchanged "Merry Christmas's" and "good Morning" with the family.

Well turns out that I did get a couple gifts, I got a sketch book! (From the dollar store )from my mom and a backpack from my dad, plus a giftcard from my grandparents!

Then this happened, I feel so so so selfish for thinking this way, but it just doesn't seem right or just I felt slapped in the face.

Well when my family finished opening their presents, my mom went and got the big presents. (( just a thing we do you get one big present ))

She gave my two sisters new ipods, Jada got a Kindle, new brand name clothing, and New computers.

I know those are material things and I don't need them nor do I really want them, but even at that my dad looked at my mom and then looked at me and shook his head really quick. He then went back to his sarcastic self and joked around.

I don't wanna be ungrateful for the things I got, but it was just..really mom...

Plus why do the need those things too, sigh Christmas is such a commercialized holiday. It's so buy buy buy, and spend spend spend, oh and presents. It's about family, or have we all forgotten this?

You know what I would really like, what I WOULD want for Christmas?? Just spend one day with her.. Now that I think about it.

I really don't like my mom, for all the pain she has put me threw. I still wouldn't mind a chance to spend time with her. Do something that mother's and daughters do, cause growing up I never had that chance.

.......

Well at least the sketch book will be loved, and the backpack will be used for placing my lunch in for work.