Waahh... I hate myself T^T^T^T
I started to silently pout/complain again T^T^T^T i was not to do that T^T^T
I wanted to talk! I wanted to speak with him T^T^T
I'm sorry.... Please forgive me! T^T^T^T^T
But I guess I best let you talk with other when you want to right? ^^
Wait.. that wasn't it...
Now I remember why I did that...
Waa.. I'm gonna feel lonely next year I bet...
Oh, I hope you would be happy.. If being with her makes you happy.. I'll let you...
You'll want to sit with her in the bus.. You'll keep training her... You'll always be talking to her... Maybe you'll be with some classes with her.. You'll walk her there... I bet I'll be forgotten...
... Love hurts... Ah, I hope you could be happy if so...
I love you... I will be left behind.. I'll be the frozen memory.. You can do what you like.. I wish for your happiness... I want to make you happy.. but I guess I'm not doing well enough for you....
Please forgive me... I'm so mean to you...
I love you, I love you so terribly that I'm now scared of losing you.. to death and to someone else... I'm so frightened that I fear if I hurt you that you'd leave... My love will always be there for and to you.. I wish for you to be happy...
If it means giving up my own happiness for yours.. I'll gladly give it.. Just tell me..
I want to tell you all I wanted to say from so long ago.. notes I kept to myself, just thinking if I brought them up, they'd be a bother... But I have so many things I wanted to say.. problems, hopes.. wishes.. but I know you don't read much things since you're not interested in reading.. so yeah..
Though I wonder.. should I show you my notes..? I should be clear with you... But always when I want to tell you.. You're not here.. I want to tell you all that's inside my mind.. I want to say everything I kept keeping inside my mind for a long time...
-I'm lonely.. I will be lonely next year... I want to see you a lot next school year.. but your attention will be on the incoming student of yours.. Ah so terrible of me to want your attention so much~... What is causing me to feel this way.. would you know so you could tell me..? Mmmm.. I don't know.. I'm only just using guesses.. But I guess I feel as if I'll lose you to another girl you'll love so much better and more caring to you.. understanding... Thinking I'm lower than her.. I guess you could say I'm frightened ^^......
-Why do you always leave me when I at least find one of the others.. like when I meet them.. you try walking away.. It makes me feel as if you don't want to be around me.. Just trying to walk away when having the chance of me maybe paying attention to the other more.. then you disappear... You're making me sad.. I'm getting lonely..
-I want you to try.. I want to find longer times to be with you.. the classes together would have helped a lot.. but I'm taking other classes from you... extra classes you need to take will decrease the possibility of being with you in any class.. And I do want you to pass too.. so we can have a closer chance of living together with a good future... yeah...
I'm odd now aren't I..? ^^
Yeah... That's all for now.. I think.. dunno
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Many Thoughts That Come Into My Head From Time To Time
Yeah, all the words I have in life.. when I remember to post them o.o'''
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