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Hello, my lovelies! How are u today. U know I had something happen to me today that finally got me to see things differently. Even though this thing happened several times before in my past it finally clicked something inside of me.
You see I live in a house with a mom with a head problem ( stroke victim) and a brother that suffers from ADHD. Yes I know this is something that some of u are dealing with to or maybe worse and I shouldn't wine about it but I'm doing this for my sanity as well as my health.
My brother assulted me today but not enough to call the police. My brother has a long time history of hate aimed at me so it's not all his fault. After talking to my mom and aunt I found that I was being blamed for not backing down. Youed think that by now after so many years that backing down is almost like saying for me to just give up and let him have his way. I'm tired of it! He always seems to get is way, ( I know I know, key word seems) but come on!!
so after walking around the block and talking to some people ( unrelated) I found myself coming to a very sad but very safe conclusion. There is no way in hell that I can live with my family like this and survive. There is no way. So the only thing that I can think of is to just lock myself away and live in my rooms from now on. Its the only key to my sanity that might help. I will also try to write journals on a day to day basis. I might miss a few days but hell give me a brake.
I think this might help me since I have no where else to go.
what do u think?
Please tell me.
thanks,
Z

(' cry ')(' mad ') (' crying ')