Life has taken another dramatic drop. and i have just about had it. i realized that there is no point of getting mad... but it hurts , alot. and i had to switch schools this year for numerous reasons. and i did it because i thought i had no friends. but i got a call from some one yesturday night. and i realized wat i have done...i have left so much behind because i am to selfish to realize wat i have. i left my best friend behind, and i did something awful to some one i use to care about alot. i am heart broken now because i have to start over again. and i will be alone. for ever now, all because of this stupid mistake i have done and made... and because of me.. i hurt alot of people and alot of them i have know since kindergarden. and i am afraid, i am scraed as ever to go to this new school. it is so big..its like a high school. and i will no no body.
and this is why i have made my disision.... of wat my future career will be. i am going to dedicate my life to the u.s army when i am old enough. that way so people that i have hurt on this day will no longer have to put up with me and so that i can do good, buy fighting and defending people in need of help. i am so ashamed of my life righ now, that i am actually willing to put my life at risk. and alot of people that are gunna read are going to think that i am crazy as ever, but oh well that is there problem not mine. this is a possibility that i am sure, but i may change my mind if things start to settle down in to there place but for now this is wat i want.
I have high hopes that things will turn around soon, and i pray every day for more strength, and courage for this night mare that is creeping its way to me. please dear lord help me survive this chaos that is comming to me. MAY GOD BLESS AMERICA AND WILL HOPE LEAD ON !!!!
-hannah
heartsofroses · Wed Sep 02, 2009 @ 07:26pm · 0 Comments |