The reds of the sky haunted me, the only color the shown through my mind. Pain and misery, hate and anger, all the emotions I kept up inside me the force that pulled down my life, it felt as though my body was being thrown into a pit of needles I couldn't move I felt the pain was going to kill me right there, part of me however wanted it to. I just wanted it to be over I tried to scream but my voice was gone I felt like insanity was the only thing that would happen but my body became hot my anger was growing I could feel it hate rising I'm sure I was losing it. All those times the hate and battle between my mother and my father fled back to me. The times I had to watch the feuds and help heal the wounds. I couldn't take it I thought that if a day like this ever came I would be able to fight it off.
I guess though that the second time is worse because you run scenarios on how to fix it and I had them planned out as well. Excuses were made up in my mind but it seemed as though for everything I prepared just erased. The colors returned to the coolness as the breeze I felt it returning my own mind my sense of who I am all of it returned I knew who I was and how to handle it the excuses and ways to work problems out came back. Yet, just as once you crumbled and tore a paper it is almost impossible to change it back without starting anew. I felt those pieces left in me tear more and more with each remembrance of all the faults in my family.
I felt warmth and all that seemed to melt away. My little sister put her hand on my shoulder. She gave me a hug and said quietly, "I know what you know, I feel what you feel no matter what…” The cool breeze blew her hair into my face. “Our pain is connected but to loosen your pain I offer you my eternal forgiveness though anything that may happen to me." I felt warmer, a warm tear on my shoulder her tear, "I will always forgive you brother." She jumped down from the tree and went inside the house.
I still sat outside while my so-called 'family' went to bed. I tried to return to the happiness of where I was but nothing I didn't understand. 'Why oh, why couldn't I return I want to go back please just allow me once more.' I pleaded and pleaded in my mind. I knew it wasn't coming back in my heart I knew happiness never lasted. This was the disappointment of life and nothing could change it.
I looked up at the sky and I knew it was past midnight. I decided to go in and get out of the cold; I went inside still not even close to tired. I walked inside and realized it…silence. It called me once again, but this time I felt off I felt as though if this went on any longer I would go insane. I longed for it, silence but even if I longed for it I still didn't want it. I looked around in our so called 'family' room it was dark but I still knew where everything was my grandfathers sword, he was a pirate back in his days and was killed as well. The unused couch, end table, and the everything else the only things that were used were the lamps and things that my parents would throw at each other.
I walked to my room trying not to wake anyone up even though it would be payback for wakening me up in the night. I passed my parents room then stopped and turned back then slowly opened the door trying to make sure that in no way they would notice me. I walked inside and I was amazed because even in the darkness I seen so many pictures. It was weird I felt my heart racing as I walked in the room. I never was in my parents room it was amazing but yet a little weird for some reason but I don't know why.
I walked on through the room while my parents were asleep and it seemed like they won't wake up. I turned to one of there dressers and it was covered with a bunch of pictures. I grabbed one and held it in the sliver of light coming form the hallway. It was a picture of a boy and girl they seemed like they were twins, but it was hard to make out all the way. I put that one down and started look at all the others…. none of them were of my little sister or me.
I can't believe it who were they? 'They couldn't of been, impossible, but…no way.' I looked from picture to picture and I found one of my parents with them, they looked so much younger and happy. They looked like they actually loved each other compared to now where all they show are signs of hate. 'They can't be, I still don't believe it…. NO! They’re not my brother and sister,' this battle in my mind is driving me crazy it seems as though this day was out to get me 'why now, WHY!?'
I found something, a newspaper article. Even though it was dark I tried to make out as much as I could skimming through it out of a feeling of wanting, wanting to know more about them. My heart suddenly stopped. Here this passage explained everything, "a horrifying car crash killed the son and daughter of…" I couldn't believe it that can't be right. Right there in black ink was my parents’ names. I read on as I did the math this was possible the year, the ages, all of it. It was starting to make sense little by little I started to realize it they were my old siblings. My sister and me came after them about two years later.
This had to end I couldn't stand it anymore they don't deserve to live. Those discussing excuses of so-called parents I can't believe them they denied it in they're own way of not even telling us. How could they, a life is a life for all humans, but they don't even deserve to be considered humans. I ran out of the room as fast as I can but I knocked some thing over, another damn picture. This time though it was of my little sister she was smiling one of the few times. I don't get it why her I seen no picture of me I looked everywhere in here but none why her and only her.
I ran to the 'family' room and grabbed my grandfather’s sword. I was finally going to end this all of this. I felt that deep down they deserved this to die. I walked slowly back to their room and unsheathed the sword brought it to my fathers neck and pushed forward with my wrist while moving the blade upward. I seen also I seen his eyes for a split second I seen his pain and agony gush out and I wish so much that that second was like a thousand years of hell in the deepest part of hell. The blood started to come out all over blood flowed on the bed and started to run off on the floor. I was about to laugh but though that my mother might put up a fight if she was up. I walked over there with the bloody sword and my feet wet with my father’s own blood. I pulled the sword up to he neck and just as my father I cut her throat. He eyes flashed same as his and yet again I hoped for the farthest pit of hell for them to stay. Her blood unfortunately spat on my body but I didn't mind at all. I started to head to the door lost in my sense of happiness.
Something cracked and I looked down a picture frame laid on the ground while my foot was bleeding from the broken glass. My nerves moved my foot instantly after I felt the silver frame stab into the bottom of my foot and there I seen it my sister. The only picture of my parent’s recent life. They had no picture of me none at all I couldn't stand it she is none of my family as them she was always considered a part of their family more to say then I was.
In the darkness I found my sisters room and walked in slowly unsure if my sister was truly awake. I heard no change in breaths or anything so I walked in slowly rose the sword above her head and…… I. I couldn't move my heart seemed to stop. She was moving but then she stopped. I then put the sword at the neck and slide its blade across her neck. I seen her eyes though, eyes of forgiveness. Then right there I felt something strike me in the heart. I looked around and nothing was there, I struck again and again. I fell to the ground in pain, what was this? There was noting on the ground and no blood coming from me how could this be?
A few more strikes and then I cringed up with pain. My food hit something though, it was a picture frame the same that had my sisters picture in my parents room. It had my picture in it, I was smiling and happy. Why did she have it I went to pick it up and beneath it was a note. It said, "Brother I know your pain in all of this and by now you must of realized that we had a brother and sister. Mom and Dad never told us about them and I know you’re mad. I took this picture from their room a while ago because you were the only family I was sure about and it seemed to have made me smile, I guess I haven't seen you smile in a long time…." there it was that line she said outside "…..I know what you know, I feel what you feel no matter what, our pain is connected but to loosen your pain I offer you my eternal forgiveness though anything that may happen to me, I forgive you." As if she knew something was going to happen to her but why, why couldn't I see this note first? What is wrong with me? Why did I have to kill her looking back at it all killing her was in no way I wanted things to end. It happened again another strike and not I felt it like a hundred needles poking me drawing blood was this me or someone else? No ones here though but the pain is worse was this my conscious? It had to be but the only way to stop it is to die. I had to no matter what I couldn't live on like this I just couldn't. I grabbed the sword and pointed at my heart. And with one pull back I pierced my heart. That one second though was misery I felt my whole body cringe in pain, pain the others couldn't imagine when alive and for others who were dead.
That is how it happened the ending of my life one of pain and misery. My parents lay in their beds dead while much of their blood was soaked into the bed. I was on my little sister's floor while what little blood came out that wasn't soaked in by my clothes was laying on the floor soon to dry. My little sister lay in her bed like a dead angel with her eyes of forgiveness and pain. The note lay out on the ground but at the end written in blood was:
"Sis I'm sorry for everything, you have gone through more than me but yet you forgave me."
No one found us or knew that we were missing so we lay there as our bodies decayed in the middle of the woods.
Five years ago, my sister and I were drawn to this place. The cold winter, tall trees, and colors of great joy. My family gazed upon the sky as all of nature's beauty was shown. When we were happy. When we didn’t know of our other family. When our parents were good actors.
