I recieved this news this wednesday:
My maternal grandmother is very ill, she's currently living in Mexico's city -with my mother's sister, my aunt- n the doctor's who are in charge of her do not expect her to live for much longer....so my mother wants to ask permition to the immigration department, so we can go to Mexico n come back w/no problems. The thing is that, when the immigration dep. started processing our documents, they TOLD US THAT we could not leave the country, because it'll mess up the process-thing.... but my mother says that...even w/out the permition-thing, we're still going... n she wants us to leave in the late days of December, or early January...
I didn't wanted to tell anyone...muchless Ryo (my boyfriend) ...but .... I can't help myself keeping things this big....so I told him this thursday...n he got depress (he didn't wanted to write...eat his fav. meal -cookies- *saddly smiles* ...or even talk.... he just hugged me n didn't let go ... he tightly wrapped me around his arms... he was .... very sad n so was I .... ..... .... Devil's bride2 n the others know as well.....
I know I'm 18 so.... if I want.... maybe I can stay...but .... even if I can, Idk if I would (it's against my nature to leave those ones in need, even if they've hurt me) .. I don't like being selfish -I think we all deserve to be happy n I'm unhappy that I have to be making this kind of choises every single time I achive so- so ....even if I have to leave my friends I'm gonna have to do so..... because.... I'm supposed to be there for my family...but....it's not fair..... everything was starting to look up...n then this..... I DON'T WANT TO GO THROUGH THE SAME THING AGAIN!! I don't want to move ....I don't want to leave my friends..... I don't want to leave Ryo!! .... n ... I don't want to lose anyone I love while I'm not here!! like it happen the last time.... ..... to Luis.....
My mother needs me, I know...but she's always gotten along better w/my older sister....n if she goes back to Mexico my sister WILL be there for her...so why would she need me??? ....
we talked yesterday (my mom n me) ...she doesn't want to screw up our documents -my brother's n mines- but she doesn't want to go back alone either.... so..... even if I don't go, she's most likely to take my lil' brother.... either way I'm end up separated from the people I mostly care about.... for in my family, the one I care the most is Stantonwilliam, my lil' brother.... so ..... I don't know what's gonna happen....
I talked to my counselor at school.... n then w/my mother again this friday... they both agreed that it'll be better if we left after the end of the school year....so ...we might end up leaving on May or June....if nothing happens to my grandmother before..... but what if it does? what then?.... I don't want to go.... if this had happen a year n a half ago.... I would be okay w/it...but not now...not now.....
pam_rdz_garcia Community Member 
|
|
