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broken feelings's Journal
June 2, 2008
"nobody knows who I really am
I've never felt this empty before
and if I ever need someone to come along
who's gonna comfort me and keep me strong"


Huh. *sighs* I've got this song stuck in my head. Thank god it's not another certain song. Lately I've been feeling a little depressed, but most of the time it's not that bad. It's like I turn from depressed to happy to angry,stressed, etc. "So weird." lol lol I must be so demented right now or I mean I feel like I sound really demented. "The most sustainable girl" that's what two of my classmates said the other day. Hah. rofl Aw man. I have serious problems. I feel so fricking hysterical/weak like I could just fall apart with headachey-ness, uselessness or something else so ridiculously stupid. At least that's what I think. Man. *sighs again* I'm such a drama girl. I mean I feel like a freakin' overreacting "oh woe is me" emotional damsel in distress. "I'm so pathetic. My personality is so bad. Who would ever like me? It seems like I'm always alone in my little space of the world. I'm such a horrible person. I probably deserve it." I'm always letting people down. It's like I keep falling and falling and when I get back up I'm always at a lower place than where I was at before. So much depression/sulky-ness. It's like I'm throwing my own pity party. I even had a celebratory meal to celebrate! rofl I don't even make sense. It feels like I'm on some non existent high. *laughs* Like I'm drunk, but I'm not. Well not in the liquor, alcoholic,drug,etc. sense. For some reason there are a lot of times when I feel like that too. Maybe it's my personality or my childhood. Hahahaha. Sure blame the childhood. It's always like that. People saying "Oh. I had a bad childhood." Well so did I. Some doctors,counselors or psychiatrists would probably say that and make their conclusions based on that. Actually my childhood really wasn't bad, but I think that that's what some people have said. They're like "It must've been really hard." I say stuff like "Um.... it wasn't that bad." They go all "So it wasn't that traumatic?" while going over flash cards with me. Flash cards with terms like "overwhelmed", "scared", "surprised", "tired", "sad", "happy", etc. You know. Well, actually that was just the previous school counselor. Well, I know I shouldn't be complaining like this. Should I? It's all a bunch of hooey. You'd know tons of reasons why. Right? Well, I g2g. This was just an outlet for me in a time of "demented-ness". I'm not always like this. See ya.

lol rofl I just felt like typing this. You know like when you just feel an urge to type like this? Well, something like that I guess. I had one of those moments. Really g2g now. End of post for now. Type later probably.

*at a later time on June 4, 2008*
OMG. I'm such a terrible non literate typer/writer/journal entry poster. sweatdrop ninja crying Not that I haven't realized it before, but I can't help it. Used ''like'' too many times. sweatdrop





 
 
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