You know what?? I've come to realize something in these past few days. I'm a Realist. I never plan to be an overly to do Optimist. I've gotten almost completely out of being such a big pessimist, but unfortunatly, I know I'm never going to stop disliking myself. The best solution?? Don't think about it, and I have come to know and understand this. So unfortunatly, if Leon-kun can't accept me for who I am like this, it's the end of the line, and we'll just stay friends, hopefully...
I have come to find out, I can't change myself that drastically that quickly, especially not to please a guy. Don't get me wrong! I want to make sure that Leon-kun is happy and that he doesn't have to go through any hardships, especially not because of me! But this is who I am, and it's very doubtful I'm going to change.
My only problem seems to be that I rather don't like myself. I'm not saying I hate myself, not anymore anyways... I simply don't like who I am and especially not how I look. I know there's nothing to be done about it though, not that I'm willing to do anyways, but it happens...
Okay, I guess I should take a subject change... Today at work was interesting 0.o;; Washi-sama nearly killed everyone in the Van durring driving. We got 2 hours for lunch. Then after work Washi-sama and I went shopping. Not a lot, just getting Washi-sama form hair dye and then we went out to dinner. Yum! ^__^ I had steak. Now I'm home and doing nothing really. Oh well. I'll prolly get to drawing soon, then some sleep for tomorrow. Joy... Work at 9... -_-;;
So I guess that's all for now... Just wish I could get ahold of Leon-kun, but he's prolly working right now... So, later.
Ja ne... Zzzz...
 RDKitsune · Sat Jul 30, 2005 @ 03:37am · 1 Comments |
