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I feel useless and unwanted; not by anyone. Not my friends, not my family... I'm just extra baggage that no one really wants to carry but they put on their happy face masks and tote me around anyways and allow me to think that they want me, but secretly, they hate my guts and just wish I'd go away.
And I would... if I could. But my death is not something I wish to dictate.

But if it'd make the world happier, I'd do it.

I just hate feeling like I'm getting on people's nerves. See, when my friends don't talk to me or acknowledge me, I tend to get the feeling like they just... want me to... I dunno... poof. Go away. Forever. And that doesn't do a lot for me.

And I really want to cry right now.
But I can't.
Because... I'm afraid to.
I don't know why; I just am.
I feel like a scared little five year old, lost in a big convienence store, with no one around to ask for help.
I'm lost. Hopelessly lost.
And I can't function; I can't think, I can't breathe: I'm completely freakin' paralyzed.

I want to be wanted; I want to not be worthless and useless.
I want to have a purpose.
And I want to know that I'm not hated. Unless, of course I AM, in which case I would also like to know (kthnx).



Hmm, so there's my rant.
Now to go get organized for school. Bloody freakin' school.
Bleh.