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Well well, been a while since I journaled, hasn't it?
Well, anyways, let me start with what went on the day after I last journaled...
I spoke with Christina on the phone after another rough day hoping it would make things better. Unfortunately after hearing what I did from her I became extremely discouraged and just flat out gave up. I was ready to go right then and there...I didn't speak to my parents at all when I got home, and contemplated it a bit, but I guess I blabbed to Will and he turned me in to my parents, who then freaked out (again) and, just as they warned me before, sent me to the hospital... I went in, forcefully of course, and apparently I had snapped to the point that I began saying things to my mother that I really wish I had never said...She learned things about me that I didn't want her to. (fortunately it wasn't EVERYTHING...) So anyways I spent the rest of that night in the ER just laying in bed with a damn IV in my elbow after they apparently saw it necessary to draw my blood and then shoot liquid into my veins ._. Totally not necessary...And then I had a security guard watching my room the whole night, and I never slept a wink so all I could do was just lay there in bed watching the guard, feeling awkward as hell at the fact that someone was staring at me all night... Later that morning I got picked up to be transported to the psyche ward that I would be staying at for the next several days at about 5:00...That much was actually kind of fun. They strapped me down to a gurney and I got to ride in the back of an ambulance and everything haha...It felt so weird, but fun at the same time being pushed around like a crazy person...So then I get there at around a quarter to 7:00 at this loony bin lol... There was a bunch of annoying paperwork to fill out when I got there. What is it with these hospitals and paperwork!? Haha... So later that morning I still never slept so I just laid in bed the whole morning until breakfast, and I never ate much that time either. I dunno why. I guess I just wasn't hungry : / So then when I meet everyone they seemed pretty nice actually. Nobody there was a total loon so it was pretty comfy actually. I ended up meeting a few people who apparently left on the day I got there so I didn't have much time to get to know them : / oh well, they seemed like nice people anyways while I knew them I guess. So then I got to know the other people and a few new people came in, so things were pretty interesting there. I kinda had to be social so I guess I made friends that way : / it was kinda nice. Felt like summer camp but with mental help haha...Some pretty interesting people actually. None of them seemed really crazy in my book. I swear they drugged me at the hospital one day though >.> Those pills must've been the wrong pills, cause I was WAY happier than I should've been for that short time...I acted like I was drunk. So not cool. So then after five days at the psyche ward I get sent to a new home, which was kinda crappy but not terribly bad I guess : / the people there were a bit weirder. Everyone looked so hella hardcore and they all had cutting problems or drug problems .-. I so felt like I did not belong there. It wasn't even much help there at all and I'm not a druggie or a cutter like them so yea...So not helpful. I should've just gone home after the psyche ward, but I wanted time off from school and I got my own room so that was pretty nice I guess haha... Anyways...After a long stay there I finally got to go home, earlier than I was supposed to cause I talked my parents into taking me home so yea. It felt good being home lol. I was real happy and going all over the place taking it all in again. My parents are supposedly restricting me a bunch now though ._. I have to tell them everything and I can't even use my laptop again for now so I'm stuck on the desktop with them constantly looking over my shoulder...So annoying >.> and I can't even go within 20 feet of my house without them knowing or else they'll freak out and think I'm running away ._. so retarded... I should be more stable now though...Christina is coming home today, and then everything will be alright...Or at least begin to be anyways...I can finally talk to her in the evenings again and she'll be sleeping in her own bed again at last... Welcome home, my love...<3
Well, that's about it I guess. My crazy life over the past couple of weeks : / I wrote more in a real life journal of mine that I don't feel like writing here. This is just the gist of what happened there, so yea...Guess that's all for now.
I love you Christina...So so much <3 <3Forever and ever, til death do us part, my love<3
II Xero II · Thu Jan 28, 2010 @ 03:45am · 1 Comments |
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