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Unicorn Day
Unicorn Day

"Avanians rush to Cardania to take part in the celebrated National Unicorn Hunting Day in memorial of [insertnamehere] for his mighty brawl with the beast Floweritcus."

"This National Holiday of the humans is looked down upon the Cardanian's, who think of the beloved unicorns as noble creatures of the land. The true beauty of Cardania. Because of this, Cardania and Avania have, currently, been butting heads with each other. If you can put it like that."

"The two nations feud has come to a boil when Queen Olayinka Asari-Dokubo stole Lord Sven Nightshade's brother, the faerie ninja Flower."

"After several months of his bed being empty, Lord Sven finally attacked! He threw candied unicorn eggs at Queen Olay until she gave up Flower, but not after teaching him the way of the mighty stripper. Lord Sven's bed, has never been the same."

"OH HO HO! It did not stop there! Queen Olay set her sights on the Faerie stripper once more. She made a diplomatic trip to Cardania, which she woed the Lord with gifts of women and men..."

"It is rumored that she caused his hut to explode, but that has yet to be confirmed. The woman took this time to kidnap her protege once again. As to where she took him, it has not been confirmed."

Posterus

"It has been rumored that Zrad, King of the Cogs as some call it, is kidnapping humans from Quietus and using them for experiments."

"It has been rumored that he gathers the humans by the dozen and smuggles them into his metal city of doom. Some theorists even say that he buys humans from off the black market, but this has not been confirmed."

"It has also been rumored that he turns most of them into machines to work in his Metal City of Dooooom. But, a few survivors say they were "assaulted" sexually, but most theorists say it wasnt assault because they enjoyed it."

"These survivors have serious back pain from the 'heaviness' of King-Lord-Machine Zrad. It hasn't been proven that the King-Lord-Machine CANNOT reproduce, but it has been rumored greatly. His sexual preference has been under scrutiny as well. Many theorists assume he is, in fact, gay... preferring male cyborgs over females. This HAS been proven from an anonymous source."

"And by Anonymous, we mean Lemo the secu--- OH s**t. I mean, we mean anonymous. D--Did anyone hear that? No? No? You sure? Make sure to edit that out-- Back to our point."

"Anyways! While Zrad may seem perfect in every way, he is just a mooshy evil teddy bear. So kids, beware his 'heaviness' -winkwink- and stay away from his Metal City of Doooom (aka Posterus) unless you are a machine, or able to lift 900+ pounds."


Cardania

"Cardania: Ruled by the illustrious Centaur tribe of [insertnamehere]. The Centaurs have ruled the Mystic Nation for centuries. In recent years, it has been ruled by the Sven of [insertnamehere], aka Sven Nightshade. One thing that can be said about Sven Nightshade, and this is a wide known fact around the kingdom; he will date anything.And when I mean anything, anything that will move."

"While seeming like a total Horndog/horse, Sven is really just a caring person. Two prime examples are Olay and Flower, his lover and lover...er..."

"He doesn't have a lover. It has been said he has a Harem of Women that reside in his hut. We have eyewitness accounts to prove this fact. No one knows about his relatiobship with his half brother, the infamous Faerie Ninja named Flowerticus aka Alecay Nightshade the fourteenth. Some people say it's more than just brotherly love. Again, this has been proven by eyewitness accounts as for the human Olay, we have no idea."

"Now, Lord Sven is always frequenting the night clubs of Cardania, always coming in with his white, polyester pants and tight shirts. It has been rumored that he CAN turn into a human. As for why, we do not yet know but some theorists suggests that he has a young maiden/maleden [[I DON'T KNOW]] in Quietus. This has yet to be confirmed."

Avania

"The Queen of Avania has been seen crossing the Black Swamp into Cardiana territory, eye witness reports say. Why? We have yet to figure out, but theorists seem to think she is going to visit a certain young cow man. Er..horse."

"But these theories have been slightly disproven. Her visits have been to see to the young Faerie Maiden, Alecay Nightshade the Fourteenth. It has been said that Lord Sven and Queen Olayinka have been in a custody battle over young Flowerticus. There have been eyewitness accounts as well saying that Lord Sven and Queen Olayinka have been heard arguing over the maiden, Flowerticus."

"There has been no word from young Flowerticus, but we have assumed that he is as afraid as the rest of us. Who would want a half horse man and an angry woman fighting over you? But anyways. Local residents have said that the couples bickering has taken a new level. The two have been seen blowing things up and throwing things at each other, causing the young Flowerticus to fly away screaming about random things like a blabbering bafoon."

"This has been proven that Lord Sven caused this rukus. -cough- There have been other rumors about the Queen of Avania. Rumors have it that she has been romantically linked to an unsavory character, Malum [insertlastname], but this has yet to be proven. So far, she has taken young Flowerticus under her wing."






 
 
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