Dear Diary, It's been another two and a half weeks. Yesterday I passed out again while monitoring the potential Kiras. I've just woken up from my 16 hours of sleep. Can you believe it? I passed out the day after I wrote that last entry. If it weren't for Watari, I think I would've been hospitalized. Raito doesn't look like he's doing so well. In fact, that was an understatement. Sometime during the confinement, Raito changed. He's become... pure. No, no, I can't think like that. It's not 'purity' that changed within him. It's something else. Some part of his personality shifted. I could just feel it. But "feeling it" isn't positive evidence, so I shouldn't rely on my intuition to tell me these things. Either way, I've come up with a plan to prove for the time being whether or not Amane-san and Raito are Kira and Second Kira. It will involve Yagami-san's cooperation. Details can't be written out as of yet, because the fine points are still under construction. I wish I could feel excessively guilty for thinking this: I am glad the killing have resumed though. It proves for the time being that Raito is innocent. I don't know why I want so badly for him to be innocent. All of my unemotionally-related logic tells me that Raito is Kira. But whenever I let my mind wander, it goes back to him. Him and my wishing that he is not Kira. But no matter what, I will make sure that the others do not find out about these personal feelings. What would become of my reputation if it were known that I was letting my own emotions get involved in a case? I do not wish to think these things.
Watari called the House when I passed out. It was three in the morning and apparently it sent Mello in to hysterics. So easily excitable... I really worry about his stability sometimes. But his brilliance is absolutely astounding. It makes me wonder if the House should have let them know of their current ranking as successors. Maybe if it had been kept it a secret from them, they would not act as they do today. Maybe their personalities would be more normal. More stable. Maybe I could've stopped it... I've been blaming myself for far too much lately. More than anything, I may just have to consider taking a break form the case for a day. But what would I do for a day? It's not like I have any other people to converse with other than the police on the case. On second thought, I do have... Raito.
L
minikimii · Thu Jul 17, 2008 @ 09:07pm · 1 Comments |