I TOLD her!!!! I ******** TOLD HER!!! AUGHHH! I cant belive what happened!!! Well turns out Sushi STILL hates me Though i dont know why!? if she has a problem with me why doesn't she just up and SAY IT!! Well my suspicions were true.. they were going out =__='' not that i wasn't already informed...
It all started two days ago when i suddenly got the urge to see her. I went to her house.. nobody was home ,no surprise...( I later found out she was at Sushi's) So i left her a message on her Awnsering machine. She called bak and made plans to see eachother the next day. So yesterday i called her and we planned to meet at the mall. I called my friend up and she provided me with an alibi, so after waiting forever for my ride, my friend met me at the mall but my crushy wasn't there. after figuring out we missed her by like, three minutes we went back to her place. Crushy calls her house and we end up meeting at the local Wing Nutz. We talked but i figured she wasn't going to tell both of us the WHOLE story ina public place.
So today i stopped by for a quick chat and she told me everything!! and i mean everything!!! God I was shaking so hard i thought i was going to be sick...right down to the last detail.. she told me about her feelings for Sushi...well...I sat there like an idiot for about five full minutes when i decided....well, she prolly needs the ego boost... so i sucked it up and told her... *long sigh* well it didn`t help much that the first thing she did was gawk at me wide-eyed and go `really?..whoa REALLY?` but i guess theres not much elce she could say...and as she did to me... i told her everything....and i mean mostly all this s**t here in my journal ( which BTW excuse the typo`s im just getting used to this new keyboard on my brand spanking new Laptop ^-^) Turns out that she did like me too..:: on and off:: and that she kinda new but when she wanted to ask me out she couldnt because she though id say no... she had found one of my journal entrys id written to Monster...and she learned about alot of stuff...about Sushi.. and Lauren..and herself... but apparently she couldnt tell me that she read it because she didnt see me for a long time afterwards...
apparently she felt pretty bad when i told her that I got jealous really easily whenever she was around Lauren or whoever... and that ive been waiting forever for her to ask me out...but its just the truth...and i guess that it felt pretty good that i was telling her everything...but... i just dont know what shes going to do about it... i mean... from what shes told me she still has feelings for Sushi, even though Sushi was just using her to test whether she was truly bisexual or not...which pisses me off because she did the same thing to me!!
and well Crushy knows i still like her..although for her sake im trying not to... im pretty convinced i dont love her anymore...but when im with her...i ...i lose track of everything...I still get jealous when she mentions Sushi...and i hate it!! Why do i have to be such a ******** PANSEY!!! SHOOOT MEEEE!!! I wanna ******** die! im sick of all this!! Emotions suck! I dont know if maybe now that i told her i like her she might start liking me back again... but then i think that she still likes Sushi!!! You know what.. maybe i should just butt out of all this and be through with the both of them!! Crushy can stay at that school with Sushi for all i care!! thats the whole reason she went to that school in the first place!! Im just going to keep doing what ive done all this time!! Love only Link, grow old and die!!
Kyomi Community Member |
|
Community Member