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Blades of tall grass dragged by the wind
scent of flowers through the breeze
a long black fluffy tail rises above the grass
green glowing eyes can be seen through the grass
a wiggle of the rear
a graceful leap
an even more graceful landing
a swipe of the paw the cat has her prey
bloody paws licked clean
a nice lay in the sun
eyes closed contently
the hunter is at ease
twisted
- by Neko Nails |
- Poetry And Lyrics
- | Submitted on 07/15/2008 |
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- Title: Neko Fluff
- Artist: Neko Nails
- Description: wanted to write this down for a while but never had a place to post it
- Date: 07/15/2008
- Tags:
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Comments (4 Comments)
- Agrikar the Hidden - 04/05/2009
- Wow. Nightmare, you literally know nothing about poetry... so just never rate anything here again, alright? Sound good? It's people like you that likely rate good poetry badly, for stupid reasons. That being said; the poem was alright, you just need to work on the rhythm more than the rhymes; you don't NEED it to rhyme, unlike what Nightmare thinks.
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- 290DarkStars - 01/25/2009
- forget those guys Neko! this is verry artistic! haey nightmare! havn't you ever herd of a hyku? Anyway. i love this poem because it has rythem, an actual story, and a pretty well written ending. so i say write on! as long as your passionate about what you write about its gonna be ok!
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- Nightmare Demon Queen - 01/02/2009
- Poetry Rymyes, This poetry doesnt, 1/5 if you wanna post something like this, post it in the forums or something, it doesnt work well here!
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- w h i s p e r SHOUT - 07/15/2008
- I don't like this very much; it's too repetitive. You also could have talked more about the prey.
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