• The day was a gloomy and complicated day. The day when Pa came home late.He would come home late these days, from night to morning. Lately, this has been happening. I couldnt understand the reasons he would be out so.
    My father was doting and reasonable. I did favored him more than my mother. My father would soothe me and care for me and all. Unlike my father, my mother would go to her friends and society parties. It was quite lonely as both my parents did not pay attention to me. I grew up becoming spoiled, and selfish. Since they didnt care for me, why should i care about them and their parties? I had questions of why my parents were fighting, crying, and leaving.
    I was so alone. So confused. I didnt have much friends when i was about 3 years old. Then that day finally came and all of my questions were answered.
    I woke up from hearing a womens cry. I ran to the stairs and i saw my mother,my father, and my auntie.
    My mother was holding a knife in her hand. The seemed like she was trying to hurt my father. The only thing that held her back was my auntie. She held mother from the back. I could hear the pain and the cries.
    My brother nudged me. I turned and looked at him. He was crying and all i could to was watch and sink in what was happening.
    I did'nt understand all of their words. I only remembered my mother yelling about and affair, cheating and other women. I really didn't want to understand but I did.
    When my mother came back to normalcy she would tell me to come to her. She would hug me and tell me " Men, they are just useless, and pathetic". My beautiful, sad, religious mother was holding on to me and wouldnt look at me.
    Her sadness made me incredibly depresses. A mothers tears are her daughters fear.She held out my palm and told me to keep my fathers car keys and to keep it from my father so he will not leave us. My mothers crying face, my fathers uncaring expression, my aunties pitying glance, my brothers red face.
    I will never forgive myself, for not standing up for my mother. I will not forgive myself for being who i am now.
    After that day i can not and will not forget that day. Nor will i forget many others. Those parts of my life made me the person who I am. They made me a very distrustful,unbelievable, and hateful person. I told myself there is no one who loves me and there is no one who i love. I will not succumb to those pathetic emotions of tears and sadness ever again. People are to be used for my own purposes, my father had taught me that. Men can not be trusted, my mother taught me that. Loneliness has its advantages from pain and hurt, my auntie taught me that.