• Like a blade to my wrist, I want to end it.

    The medicine, the pills, and the injections, none of them work. I take the blade to my wrist and arms, the angry red lines sating my lust for my own blood. I lick the blood from my fingers, staining my lips a lovely crimson. The coppery taste is friendly, familure, I wish I could drain the very life source from my body.

    The water around me is stained red, a contrast to my now pale skin. I hear a frantic knocking on the bathroom door, no doubt my mother worrying about me. I have been in here for three hours or more. She tends to worry about me after father hung himself, no doubt I have the same illness that he had. I step out of the bath, pull the plug and yell at momma that I'm fine. My deep purple towel is wrapped around my body, bloody water dripping to the floor around me. I unlock the door to peak at her, I flash a small smile and promise to be out in a minuet.

    I dress in a pair of shorts and a sleep shirt. Momma's sitting on my bed looking at me with her worried blue eyes, I sit with her to comfort her with a hug. A soft, loving, kiss is placed to my forehead. Her blond hair is the last thing I see before she turns off the lights and goes to her own room.

    It's only a matter of time before she finds out, I don't think that she would be able to handle it. It would kill her.

    Two weeks later

    A bitter sigh leaves my lips as I wipe the blood from my thigh. I feel dizzy, my world beginning to go black on the edges. The black is crawling through my vision, I dare not let it reach the center. The once spotted printed bedding is stained crimson, I've lost too much blood.

    As I awake, something that I feared I would not be able to do, My mothers worried blue eyes are staring at me. My wrists are bound above my head, my thigh is wrapped tightly in white linen. My bedding lay near the bed on the floor still sopping with blood. I wonder idly how long I have been sleep, momma grips my chin to bring my shameful face to look at her. She yells and screams herself hoarse, tears streaking down her pale face. I look away, I can not bear look at her anymore.

    It has been two days chained to my own bed, of this I am sure. Mother brings me food and lets me up long enough to go to the bathroom, forcing me to keep the door open. I am beginning to regain some of my strength back, Something that has her worried. She fears me, she thinks I might strike out like a caged animal.

    Unspecified time later.

    I tug at the bindings at my wrists, letting a feral snarl from my mouth. My keeper doesn't even flinch, he is used to my anger. My fears, and whats left of my pride died along time ago, when I nearly succeed. All that's left is this hallow, animal like, shell.