save usa

• Artist: urquizuroman
• Description: its about to people that and just know the goverment is evil
• Date: 07/20/2008
• Tags: govermenttookover

one day in victorville california two skaters were just skating trying to go big and a giant stretch limo pulls up who is in the limo said johnny and who comes out tony hawk comes out the limo with his skateboard tony says i need 2 kids for my skate compition dustin says we dont know how to skate tony says ill teach you both dustin and johnny go waw a goverment veichal comes with a tommy gun in the bact tat tat tat we duck and cover we needed to stop the goverment so all we have to do now is to have a revilotion we sneak over to the goverment white house we choke out all the gaurds and sneak into the white house he hear the goverment talking about they dont want a black president so they'll have to kill him we went into the room where they keep all the guns we both get two desert eagles we back to the plan rooms we bust through the door the guys were dumbies they were above us. we started shooting the goverment has ended now we can live in peace.

Comments

[Valley of Destruction]

suggest you check your spelling a bit, utilize some punctuation, figure out what exactly you want to say. Proofreading might even be helpful for you.

[elesha]

crude

[FeatherCollectorr]

Um you might wanna practice and READ your work before entering >.>

[Julia Dream]

If I tried reading that out loud I'd die from lack of oxygen. Please, take a refresher course on punctuation, spelling, proper story structuring, tenses, point-of-views, tone, and... well, frankly, every rule of grammar that most people would've learned in about third grade. This is horrendous.

[Jellybeans Toes]

Try punctuation. And explanation. And not switching from third person to first person. And a structured plot. If I could tell what the heck was happening this might be interesting, but I can't, so it isn't.